For Goodness Sake, Do Something!
by Randy Nabors
How? "How should I live out my faith?" I hoped you would ask. I want to emphasize that the Scriptures move us beyond a simple personalization of religion. If we understand our religion simply to be a moral change, or a change of personality so that we become "nice," or a spiritualized change where now we have personal meaning and relationship with God, then we have missed what true religion is supposed to be. Yes, the gospel can and does all of the preceding things mentioned, but it calls us to more. It calls us personally to "weightier matters of the law, like justice and mercy"(Matt. 23:23). It calls us, both as individuals and corporately as congregations, to help the poor (James 1:27, 2 Cor. 8-9, Matt. 25: 31-46).
Monday, December 25, 2006
Thursday, December 21, 2006
Humility is difficult
By Jim Wallis
We all know Lent is meant to be a time of reflection, deepening, and preparation for Easter. Lent is also a call to repentance and, especially, humility. With Lent's beginning on Ash Wednesday, we impose (I love that word) ashes as a very physical, visual, and tangible act of repentance and humility - a mark and act of commitment, not merely a rote ritual.
Some members of our staff have suggested to me that the events of recent weeks and months call us to humility. But humility is a difficult virtue for those who are called to a prophetic vocation - people like us.
Humility is difficult for people who think they are, or want to be, "radical Christians."
Humility is difficult when you're always calling other people - the church, the nation, and the world - to stop doing the things you think are wrong and start doing the things you think are right.
Humility is difficult for the bearers of radical messages.
When we're always calling other people to repent and change, it's not always easy to hear that message for ourselves.
I want to suggest that there is a real and very deep tension between humility and the prophetic vocation. And most prophetic Christians I have known - present company and preacher included - are really not very good at humility.
You see we are always making judgments of others - church leaders, political leaders, majority cultures - but are not often good at applying the judgment to ourselves. Even when the prophetic judgments we are making are necessary, they seldom lead us to humility. After all, we are the ones who know how other people are supposed to change. We are the ones with the answers. We are the ones who are doing it right.
How do we preach like Amos - "Let justice roll down like waters, and righteousness like a mighty river!" - without becoming self-righteous ourselves? I think that is very difficult. Perhaps Micah had it right: "What does the Lord require of you but to do justice, and to love kindness, and to walk humbly with your God?"
And we are especially prone to turn our righteous judgments on each other, at those close at hand, even within our own community - and that can be especially destructive. When that happens, if the truth be told, radical Christian communities are not always pleasant places to be.
When the prophetic indignation we offer daily to the world is turned toward those who happen to be in judging, glaring, or shouting distance of us when we decide they too have fallen short of our ideals - look out!
And let me be human and honest enough to say that leaders in church, state, and certainly faith-inspired organizations should always be held accountable, but being a leader in a prophetic Christian community is often a very hard place to be. Just look at the qualities necessary for the prophetic vocation: The capacity to speak clearly, strongly, boldly, decisively, distinctively, and of course, visibly. I would say, from my experience, that none of those qualities lead directly to humility.
Likewise, the call to be and offer an alternative reality, community, vision, lifestyle, etc., requires an energy and confidence that, again, is not necessarily prone to humility.
So what can save us radical Christians? The same thing that saves everybody else: the grace of God.
I've found myself remembering an old article prompted by a time in the life of Sojourners when these issues were very much at play. It was an article I felt quite convicted to write as a correction to ourselves, to myself, to the prophetic vocation we had chosen. I remember I stayed home from a prophetic anti-nuclear action that many of us were undertaking because I felt the need to think and write instead. It's from May of 1979. It's pretty faded now, but I think it might be relevant to us today:
"Sojourners has written much and often about the abuse and cheapening of grace. In many ways, it is the place where we began. That concern still stands; cheap grace continues to be the greatest affliction of the churches.
"Radical Christians, however, face another problem. It is the tendency to seek justification in our lifestyle, our work, our protest, our causes, our movements, our actions, our prophetic identity, and our radical self-image. It becomes an easy temptation to place our security in the things we stand for and in the things we do, instead of in what God has done. It is a temptation to depend on things other than God's grace.
"'For by grace you have been saved through faith; and this is not your own doing, it is the gift of God - not because of works, lest [anyone] should boast (Ephesians 2:8-9).' Grace is the logic of a loving God. There is nothing we can do to earn it, win it, or deserve it. Grace is simply a gift, not a reward. We can receive it only by faith, not through good works.
"Grace saves the prophetic vocation. The knowledge and experience of grace can ease the seriousness with which we tend to take ourselves. Grace can restore our humility, our sense of humor, and our ability to laugh at ourselves. All are regularly needed by prophets.
"To trust grace is to know that the world has already been saved by Jesus Christ. It is to know that we cannot save the world any more than we can save ourselves. All our work is done only in response to Christ's work. To receive the gift of grace is to let go of self-sufficiency and to act out of a spirit of gratitude.
"Radical Christians must pursue more than a successful strategy; we must seek a deeper faith. Only then will we have the assurance of salvation, not because of what we have accomplished, but because we have allowed God's grace and mercy to flow through our lives." This article was adapted from Jim Wallis' reflections at Sojourners' Ash Wednesday service March 1, 2006.
We all know Lent is meant to be a time of reflection, deepening, and preparation for Easter. Lent is also a call to repentance and, especially, humility. With Lent's beginning on Ash Wednesday, we impose (I love that word) ashes as a very physical, visual, and tangible act of repentance and humility - a mark and act of commitment, not merely a rote ritual.
Some members of our staff have suggested to me that the events of recent weeks and months call us to humility. But humility is a difficult virtue for those who are called to a prophetic vocation - people like us.
Humility is difficult for people who think they are, or want to be, "radical Christians."
Humility is difficult when you're always calling other people - the church, the nation, and the world - to stop doing the things you think are wrong and start doing the things you think are right.
Humility is difficult for the bearers of radical messages.
When we're always calling other people to repent and change, it's not always easy to hear that message for ourselves.
I want to suggest that there is a real and very deep tension between humility and the prophetic vocation. And most prophetic Christians I have known - present company and preacher included - are really not very good at humility.
You see we are always making judgments of others - church leaders, political leaders, majority cultures - but are not often good at applying the judgment to ourselves. Even when the prophetic judgments we are making are necessary, they seldom lead us to humility. After all, we are the ones who know how other people are supposed to change. We are the ones with the answers. We are the ones who are doing it right.
How do we preach like Amos - "Let justice roll down like waters, and righteousness like a mighty river!" - without becoming self-righteous ourselves? I think that is very difficult. Perhaps Micah had it right: "What does the Lord require of you but to do justice, and to love kindness, and to walk humbly with your God?"
And we are especially prone to turn our righteous judgments on each other, at those close at hand, even within our own community - and that can be especially destructive. When that happens, if the truth be told, radical Christian communities are not always pleasant places to be.
When the prophetic indignation we offer daily to the world is turned toward those who happen to be in judging, glaring, or shouting distance of us when we decide they too have fallen short of our ideals - look out!
And let me be human and honest enough to say that leaders in church, state, and certainly faith-inspired organizations should always be held accountable, but being a leader in a prophetic Christian community is often a very hard place to be. Just look at the qualities necessary for the prophetic vocation: The capacity to speak clearly, strongly, boldly, decisively, distinctively, and of course, visibly. I would say, from my experience, that none of those qualities lead directly to humility.
Likewise, the call to be and offer an alternative reality, community, vision, lifestyle, etc., requires an energy and confidence that, again, is not necessarily prone to humility.
So what can save us radical Christians? The same thing that saves everybody else: the grace of God.
I've found myself remembering an old article prompted by a time in the life of Sojourners when these issues were very much at play. It was an article I felt quite convicted to write as a correction to ourselves, to myself, to the prophetic vocation we had chosen. I remember I stayed home from a prophetic anti-nuclear action that many of us were undertaking because I felt the need to think and write instead. It's from May of 1979. It's pretty faded now, but I think it might be relevant to us today:
"Sojourners has written much and often about the abuse and cheapening of grace. In many ways, it is the place where we began. That concern still stands; cheap grace continues to be the greatest affliction of the churches.
"Radical Christians, however, face another problem. It is the tendency to seek justification in our lifestyle, our work, our protest, our causes, our movements, our actions, our prophetic identity, and our radical self-image. It becomes an easy temptation to place our security in the things we stand for and in the things we do, instead of in what God has done. It is a temptation to depend on things other than God's grace.
"'For by grace you have been saved through faith; and this is not your own doing, it is the gift of God - not because of works, lest [anyone] should boast (Ephesians 2:8-9).' Grace is the logic of a loving God. There is nothing we can do to earn it, win it, or deserve it. Grace is simply a gift, not a reward. We can receive it only by faith, not through good works.
"Grace saves the prophetic vocation. The knowledge and experience of grace can ease the seriousness with which we tend to take ourselves. Grace can restore our humility, our sense of humor, and our ability to laugh at ourselves. All are regularly needed by prophets.
"To trust grace is to know that the world has already been saved by Jesus Christ. It is to know that we cannot save the world any more than we can save ourselves. All our work is done only in response to Christ's work. To receive the gift of grace is to let go of self-sufficiency and to act out of a spirit of gratitude.
"Radical Christians must pursue more than a successful strategy; we must seek a deeper faith. Only then will we have the assurance of salvation, not because of what we have accomplished, but because we have allowed God's grace and mercy to flow through our lives." This article was adapted from Jim Wallis' reflections at Sojourners' Ash Wednesday service March 1, 2006.
Saturday, December 16, 2006
Praise You in This Storm
Praise You in This Storm
Casting Crowns
words by Mark Hall/music by Mark Hall and Bernie Herms
I was sure by now, God You would have reached down
and wiped our tears away,
stepped in and saved the day.
But once again, I say amen
and it's still raining
as the thunder rolls
I barely hear You whisper through the rain,
"I'm with you"
and as Your mercy falls
I raise my hands and praise
the God who gives and takes away.
Chorus:
And I'll praise you in this storm
and I will lift my hands
for You are who You are
no matter where I am
and every tear I've cried
You hold in your hand
You never left my side
and though my heart is torn
I will praise You in this storm
I remember when I stumbled in the wind
You heard my cry to You
and raised me up again
my strength is almost gone how can I carry on
if I can't find You
and as the thunder rolls
I barely hear You whisper through the rain
"I'm with you"
and as Your mercy falls
I raise my hands and praise
the God who gives and takes away
I lift my eyes unto the hills
where does my help come from?
My help comes from the Lord, the maker of heaven and earth
I lift my eyes unto the hills
where does my help come from?
My help comes from the Lord, the maker of heaven and earth
Casting Crowns
words by Mark Hall/music by Mark Hall and Bernie Herms
I was sure by now, God You would have reached down
and wiped our tears away,
stepped in and saved the day.
But once again, I say amen
and it's still raining
as the thunder rolls
I barely hear You whisper through the rain,
"I'm with you"
and as Your mercy falls
I raise my hands and praise
the God who gives and takes away.
Chorus:
And I'll praise you in this storm
and I will lift my hands
for You are who You are
no matter where I am
and every tear I've cried
You hold in your hand
You never left my side
and though my heart is torn
I will praise You in this storm
I remember when I stumbled in the wind
You heard my cry to You
and raised me up again
my strength is almost gone how can I carry on
if I can't find You
and as the thunder rolls
I barely hear You whisper through the rain
"I'm with you"
and as Your mercy falls
I raise my hands and praise
the God who gives and takes away
I lift my eyes unto the hills
where does my help come from?
My help comes from the Lord, the maker of heaven and earth
I lift my eyes unto the hills
where does my help come from?
My help comes from the Lord, the maker of heaven and earth
Testimony on Unity
I'm gonna share my testimony this Monday with the MAS & GIC fellowship.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Hi, my name is Xiaojia. I just graduated last year and have been working in GIC for a year and a half.
I became a Christian when I was in primary school. Back then, my maid, who was a catholic, shared Christ with me. Her boyfriend was a Christian, who wrote me letters and taught me how to pray. Salvation was a gift for me, as I readily believed and prayed to God whenever I was sad or angry. I was a self professed Christian who never attended church.
I only started attending church when I was in secondary 4. At 15, I was faced with the question of whether I was really saved, for God seemed so distant to me. I had a lot of doubts about God, but I experienced Him in many tangible ways, and that was when my faith was cemented.
As I attended a charismatic church, I believed in a style of praise and worship and sermons. Praise was dynamic and I jumped up and down in jubilee. Worship meant raising my hands and praying in tongues. Sermons were preached by charismatic speakers who were powerful and impacting.
At NUS, I started attending the Varsity Christian Fellowship. There, I was exposed to different styles of worship. God put in our hearts the desire for unity among Christians. As leaders, we prayed for Singaporean Christians to be one body in Christ in spite of denomination.
Last year, my faith hit a crisis as I started reading books written by Christian authors from different denominations. I found some of their points very enlightening and grew a lot through these materials. It was then that I began to feel uncomfortable with my church’s teachings and started praying about whether I should change church.
During this period of visiting different churches, I was rather confused, angry and bitter about my old church. I had been there for 8 years, and uprooting was difficult. There are practices that I don’t understand and perhaps disagree with, yet I am thankful that God was with me during this period. He encouraged me in various ways, through songs, encouragement from others and books as well. One morning in Oct, I woke up and felt this stirring within me. There was an unspoken happiness and assurance from God that He was with me through my journey. I was so thankful for His peace in the midst of the struggles that I faced. I felt my faith had grown as it was not anchored on any human being, but anchored in Him. As time passed, I began to understand the distinctive that God has blessed my previous church with. I missed the praise and worship there, as well as praying in tongues. The sermons preached there were simple and ministered to the youths. After 10 months of prayer, I am now settled down in Covenant Evangelical and am very blessed by the in-depth and strong teachings in the church.
Recently, I went to Philippines with Habitat for Humanity on a house building project in the urban slums. It was an experience of humility, working alongside the poor, regardless of our backgrounds. It strangely reminded me of how united the Israelites were in rebuilding the temple. Some stood guard against the enemies while the rest built. And what is amazing is how the gospel has come full circle in my life. My domestic helper- a Filipina was the one who first shared Christ with me, and now I was back in Philippines to share God’s love.
The body of Christ must be united in tackling the real enemy and not major on the minors by attacking each other. Many of us Christians tend to be inward looking and criticize other denominations without understanding more. Just a few days ago, a colleague asked me which denomination of Christianity I came from. I didn’t know how to answer her. I think I belong to the church of Christ. And being a Christian simply means living out a life that is Christ-like, that glorifies Christ. I find Christ most of all in the slums, when I work alongside the poor. Thank God that He still chooses to work through us, even though no church or human is infallible or perfect!
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Hi, my name is Xiaojia. I just graduated last year and have been working in GIC for a year and a half.
I became a Christian when I was in primary school. Back then, my maid, who was a catholic, shared Christ with me. Her boyfriend was a Christian, who wrote me letters and taught me how to pray. Salvation was a gift for me, as I readily believed and prayed to God whenever I was sad or angry. I was a self professed Christian who never attended church.
I only started attending church when I was in secondary 4. At 15, I was faced with the question of whether I was really saved, for God seemed so distant to me. I had a lot of doubts about God, but I experienced Him in many tangible ways, and that was when my faith was cemented.
As I attended a charismatic church, I believed in a style of praise and worship and sermons. Praise was dynamic and I jumped up and down in jubilee. Worship meant raising my hands and praying in tongues. Sermons were preached by charismatic speakers who were powerful and impacting.
At NUS, I started attending the Varsity Christian Fellowship. There, I was exposed to different styles of worship. God put in our hearts the desire for unity among Christians. As leaders, we prayed for Singaporean Christians to be one body in Christ in spite of denomination.
Last year, my faith hit a crisis as I started reading books written by Christian authors from different denominations. I found some of their points very enlightening and grew a lot through these materials. It was then that I began to feel uncomfortable with my church’s teachings and started praying about whether I should change church.
During this period of visiting different churches, I was rather confused, angry and bitter about my old church. I had been there for 8 years, and uprooting was difficult. There are practices that I don’t understand and perhaps disagree with, yet I am thankful that God was with me during this period. He encouraged me in various ways, through songs, encouragement from others and books as well. One morning in Oct, I woke up and felt this stirring within me. There was an unspoken happiness and assurance from God that He was with me through my journey. I was so thankful for His peace in the midst of the struggles that I faced. I felt my faith had grown as it was not anchored on any human being, but anchored in Him. As time passed, I began to understand the distinctive that God has blessed my previous church with. I missed the praise and worship there, as well as praying in tongues. The sermons preached there were simple and ministered to the youths. After 10 months of prayer, I am now settled down in Covenant Evangelical and am very blessed by the in-depth and strong teachings in the church.
Recently, I went to Philippines with Habitat for Humanity on a house building project in the urban slums. It was an experience of humility, working alongside the poor, regardless of our backgrounds. It strangely reminded me of how united the Israelites were in rebuilding the temple. Some stood guard against the enemies while the rest built. And what is amazing is how the gospel has come full circle in my life. My domestic helper- a Filipina was the one who first shared Christ with me, and now I was back in Philippines to share God’s love.
The body of Christ must be united in tackling the real enemy and not major on the minors by attacking each other. Many of us Christians tend to be inward looking and criticize other denominations without understanding more. Just a few days ago, a colleague asked me which denomination of Christianity I came from. I didn’t know how to answer her. I think I belong to the church of Christ. And being a Christian simply means living out a life that is Christ-like, that glorifies Christ. I find Christ most of all in the slums, when I work alongside the poor. Thank God that He still chooses to work through us, even though no church or human is infallible or perfect!
Sunday, December 03, 2006
Heart of a missionary
Check this out:
Eternal Perspectives Ministry set up by Randy Alcorn. There are quite a few good links.
In particular, I've extracted two articles for yr read. ;)
The Heart of a True Missionary
"So, I felt duty-bound to just tell my own story of how Jim Elliot and I made up our minds long before we ever fell in love, that we did not belong to ourselves, but to God Himself; and this body in which I live is holy, it belongs to God until God gives it to somebody else. So, Jim and I were perfectly clear about that independent of each other and then, when he came along and confessed to me that he was in love with me, he followed that immediately with saying, 'I'm not asking you to marry me. You go ahead and go to Africa and I'll go to South America, and if God wants to bring us together, God knows how to do it.'
"I thought I was going to Africa, but in various ways, God indicated that it was South America. And so, we waited 5 ½ years for each other. That, of course, is another tremendous lesson in sacrifice. Young people today, it is my impression, are not prepared to sacrifice. They want what they want and they want it now. They're going to get what they want, any way they can get it. When you start at the foot of the cross and lay yourself totally at God's disposal, there are a whole lot of pitfalls that are avoided."
Elizabeth Elliot
Dreams & Visions Move Muslims to Christ
More and more Muslims are having dreams and visions of Christ, Christian ministries say. There is increasing evidence that the supernatural is playing a role in drawing Muslims to Christ.
Campus Crusade for Christ has received thousands of letters from Muslims, many of whom claim to have had a similar dream of Christ, according to the ministry's radio broadcast office in northern Africa. In the dream, Jesus appears and tells people, "I am the way," Campus Crusade founder and president Bill Bright said. Moved by the dreams, they contact the radio ministry and "freely respond" to the gospel message, he said. In Algeria, an imprisoned Muslim political radical said Jesus appeared to her in her cell. The woman now is a Christian and works with Campus Crusade ministering to Muslims.
Eternal Perspectives Ministry set up by Randy Alcorn. There are quite a few good links.
In particular, I've extracted two articles for yr read. ;)
The Heart of a True Missionary
"So, I felt duty-bound to just tell my own story of how Jim Elliot and I made up our minds long before we ever fell in love, that we did not belong to ourselves, but to God Himself; and this body in which I live is holy, it belongs to God until God gives it to somebody else. So, Jim and I were perfectly clear about that independent of each other and then, when he came along and confessed to me that he was in love with me, he followed that immediately with saying, 'I'm not asking you to marry me. You go ahead and go to Africa and I'll go to South America, and if God wants to bring us together, God knows how to do it.'
"I thought I was going to Africa, but in various ways, God indicated that it was South America. And so, we waited 5 ½ years for each other. That, of course, is another tremendous lesson in sacrifice. Young people today, it is my impression, are not prepared to sacrifice. They want what they want and they want it now. They're going to get what they want, any way they can get it. When you start at the foot of the cross and lay yourself totally at God's disposal, there are a whole lot of pitfalls that are avoided."
Elizabeth Elliot
Dreams & Visions Move Muslims to Christ
More and more Muslims are having dreams and visions of Christ, Christian ministries say. There is increasing evidence that the supernatural is playing a role in drawing Muslims to Christ.
Campus Crusade for Christ has received thousands of letters from Muslims, many of whom claim to have had a similar dream of Christ, according to the ministry's radio broadcast office in northern Africa. In the dream, Jesus appears and tells people, "I am the way," Campus Crusade founder and president Bill Bright said. Moved by the dreams, they contact the radio ministry and "freely respond" to the gospel message, he said. In Algeria, an imprisoned Muslim political radical said Jesus appeared to her in her cell. The woman now is a Christian and works with Campus Crusade ministering to Muslims.
Thursday, November 30, 2006
Making a difference
Wow, think there is something we can learn from this church. ;)
Long-Distance AIDS Ministry
How one modest-sized church in North Carolina is making a big difference in the heart of Africa.
Long-Distance AIDS Ministry
How one modest-sized church in North Carolina is making a big difference in the heart of Africa.
Sunday, November 26, 2006
Definition of success
"We need a radical re-definition of "success" in the ministry. I reject the notion that the bigger the church is, the more "successful" it is. In an age of superficiality, immaturity and mediocrity, the church must be careful not to get caught in an ego-trip that equates mere numbers with success. It is easy to sacrifice the integrity of calling (and the implications of discipleship) upon the altar of bigness.
Nonetheless, I believe in church growth! In some Christian circles, "church growth" is a dirty word. Yet, nothing is sadder than an in-grown, inward-looking church. Heir of infinite resources, destined for glory, entrusted with the glorious Gospel, an in-grown church is but an irresponsible sleeping giant. There is indeed such a thing as irresponsible non-growth!"
Pastor Edmund Chan, A Calling: Covenant Evangelical Free Church
I was blown away by the sermon today, the emphasis on inward growth, before the outward. The reminder that it is relatively easy to change on the outside, but very difficult for change to come from the heart. Telling someone steps 1-10 is easy to complete, but left without the steps, one has to live based on principles. These come from the heart.
The vision of Pastor : seek to build the foundations (authentic discipleship), through which, God will build the church. The key to a missions church is discipleship.
I had to repent of whatever I had thought abt the church, that it was inward looking. For God laid upon my heart what was the heart behind this vision. That only when we are changed inwardly can we be missionaries wherever we go to, and bring transformation to the place we go to.
I'm so thankful also how every individual is so valued in this church. How comfortable it was today sharing with a leader about my journey and struggles. And how we are all on this journey, and the start of it all is to confess that we know nothing/can do nothing, only God can work through us. The more I know God, the more inadequate I feel, the more I need His grace.
God has been speaking to me. To not focus so much on my environment, not be distracted by circumstances, but to be thankful, and focus on Him. That is the discpleship of gratitude. Being thankful in all things.
Nonetheless, I believe in church growth! In some Christian circles, "church growth" is a dirty word. Yet, nothing is sadder than an in-grown, inward-looking church. Heir of infinite resources, destined for glory, entrusted with the glorious Gospel, an in-grown church is but an irresponsible sleeping giant. There is indeed such a thing as irresponsible non-growth!"
Pastor Edmund Chan, A Calling: Covenant Evangelical Free Church
I was blown away by the sermon today, the emphasis on inward growth, before the outward. The reminder that it is relatively easy to change on the outside, but very difficult for change to come from the heart. Telling someone steps 1-10 is easy to complete, but left without the steps, one has to live based on principles. These come from the heart.
The vision of Pastor : seek to build the foundations (authentic discipleship), through which, God will build the church. The key to a missions church is discipleship.
I had to repent of whatever I had thought abt the church, that it was inward looking. For God laid upon my heart what was the heart behind this vision. That only when we are changed inwardly can we be missionaries wherever we go to, and bring transformation to the place we go to.
I'm so thankful also how every individual is so valued in this church. How comfortable it was today sharing with a leader about my journey and struggles. And how we are all on this journey, and the start of it all is to confess that we know nothing/can do nothing, only God can work through us. The more I know God, the more inadequate I feel, the more I need His grace.
God has been speaking to me. To not focus so much on my environment, not be distracted by circumstances, but to be thankful, and focus on Him. That is the discpleship of gratitude. Being thankful in all things.
Saturday, November 25, 2006
Rebuilding our altars
Was really encouraged by Pastor Kai's msg today at Prayer and Praise. I felt that it was the word in season for me. How Elisha had to rebuild the altar before the fire came down. How we as christians have to rebuild our altar before revival will come.
I have a lot a lot of rebuilding to do. How I have come so short of Him, with my whinning, bad attitude and focusing on the nitty gritty stuffs that I don't like. How I am simply so distracted. It wasn't even specific things that had become my idol. It was just losing my focus on Him, and no longer having that kind of child like faith to believe in Him. I know that it will take some time for the altar to be rebuilt, but nevertheless, I was really encouraged.
It amazes me at times how the same God can speak to us in the same manner in different settings. What do I mean by this? CHC style of ministry and worship is different from CEFC. And in many occasions in the past at CHC, I had felt God's touch, and the Holy Spirit's presence over me. Similarly in CEFC, for example today, I felt the same touch of the Holy Spirit, and it was the same peace and assurance that came upon me. :D So God doesn't come by formulas and styles, He comes when a people seek Him and worship Him.
Have u ever felt so "naked" before the Lord? Like He knows u inside out and u can't hide anything from Him. And u feel so humbled. No matter how much self-justification, pretending to be good & alright, He just searches so deeply on the inside.
Been very burdened about a lot of stuffs. Especially wrt how comfortable many christians are...the lack of urgency...living like peace time when it is war time. Was just sharing with a sister from GIC CF, and she pointed out that sometimes, when burdens are given to us, it is time to look inward. Something like looking at the plank in yr own eye first, let ourselves be changed, and others be impacted by the change they see in us. And I find that is really insightful.
I have a lot a lot of rebuilding to do. How I have come so short of Him, with my whinning, bad attitude and focusing on the nitty gritty stuffs that I don't like. How I am simply so distracted. It wasn't even specific things that had become my idol. It was just losing my focus on Him, and no longer having that kind of child like faith to believe in Him. I know that it will take some time for the altar to be rebuilt, but nevertheless, I was really encouraged.
It amazes me at times how the same God can speak to us in the same manner in different settings. What do I mean by this? CHC style of ministry and worship is different from CEFC. And in many occasions in the past at CHC, I had felt God's touch, and the Holy Spirit's presence over me. Similarly in CEFC, for example today, I felt the same touch of the Holy Spirit, and it was the same peace and assurance that came upon me. :D So God doesn't come by formulas and styles, He comes when a people seek Him and worship Him.
Have u ever felt so "naked" before the Lord? Like He knows u inside out and u can't hide anything from Him. And u feel so humbled. No matter how much self-justification, pretending to be good & alright, He just searches so deeply on the inside.
Been very burdened about a lot of stuffs. Especially wrt how comfortable many christians are...the lack of urgency...living like peace time when it is war time. Was just sharing with a sister from GIC CF, and she pointed out that sometimes, when burdens are given to us, it is time to look inward. Something like looking at the plank in yr own eye first, let ourselves be changed, and others be impacted by the change they see in us. And I find that is really insightful.
Sunday, November 19, 2006
Being Single
Quite thankful for a workshop I attended at CEFC today on Dating. Perhaps quite a taboo topic for discussion, yet there was an atmosphere of openness in talking today.
Pastor Chung Kai spoke of the purpose of dating. He emphasized on the importance of friendship, and how friendship is a worthy end in and of itself. Usually when u are attracted to someone, u move on to explore if that someone is suitable, get into courtship and marry. But he suggests after being attracted, to move on to friendship with the person, leading to exploring and courtship and marriage. Hence the impt of getting to know the opposite sex for friendship.
Lordship- Christ must be Lord in all relationships. If we are unhappy being single, we will still be unhappy attached. That's because we don't expect our partner to fulfill our needs.
So once again, I said a quiet prayer, giving God Lordship over my heart.
Relationships has always been something that affected me a lot. I'm also glad for this period of single-ness where I begin to enjoy spending time with myself, and getting to know myself better. Now I understand better what I like and dislike. Learning to be independent and secure about myself.
I also understand better what kind of man I want. Defintely a man who loves God with all his heart, someone who is compassionate. Someone who is wise and kind and sensitive to others.
Recently, I seem to be coming to a place where I actually tell God it is okay if I remain single all my life. I don't know if I will really enjoy doing that...But nevertheless thankful that I am no longer that needy nor starving for love elsewhere. May His love truly and wholly satisfy. Out of which that satisfaction, I am able to love another.
What one of the speakers say today is true, we look for love elsewhere, but they never really satisfy. For many of us, including myself, God's love is sometimes what we only conceptualise in our head. But it's something we need to experience with our hearts before we can say that only that love can satisfy.
Loneliness- definitely those times when u are alone, waiting for the bus/mrt, walking down the streets and seeing people holding hands. Bible did say that it was not good for man to be alone. We all need relationships and accountability. Yet, these may not come in the form of a life partner. They may come in the form of a group of godly friends whom we attach ourselves to, people who encourage us along in this journey.
Pastor Chung Kai spoke of the purpose of dating. He emphasized on the importance of friendship, and how friendship is a worthy end in and of itself. Usually when u are attracted to someone, u move on to explore if that someone is suitable, get into courtship and marry. But he suggests after being attracted, to move on to friendship with the person, leading to exploring and courtship and marriage. Hence the impt of getting to know the opposite sex for friendship.
Lordship- Christ must be Lord in all relationships. If we are unhappy being single, we will still be unhappy attached. That's because we don't expect our partner to fulfill our needs.
So once again, I said a quiet prayer, giving God Lordship over my heart.
Relationships has always been something that affected me a lot. I'm also glad for this period of single-ness where I begin to enjoy spending time with myself, and getting to know myself better. Now I understand better what I like and dislike. Learning to be independent and secure about myself.
I also understand better what kind of man I want. Defintely a man who loves God with all his heart, someone who is compassionate. Someone who is wise and kind and sensitive to others.
Recently, I seem to be coming to a place where I actually tell God it is okay if I remain single all my life. I don't know if I will really enjoy doing that...But nevertheless thankful that I am no longer that needy nor starving for love elsewhere. May His love truly and wholly satisfy. Out of which that satisfaction, I am able to love another.
What one of the speakers say today is true, we look for love elsewhere, but they never really satisfy. For many of us, including myself, God's love is sometimes what we only conceptualise in our head. But it's something we need to experience with our hearts before we can say that only that love can satisfy.
Loneliness- definitely those times when u are alone, waiting for the bus/mrt, walking down the streets and seeing people holding hands. Bible did say that it was not good for man to be alone. We all need relationships and accountability. Yet, these may not come in the form of a life partner. They may come in the form of a group of godly friends whom we attach ourselves to, people who encourage us along in this journey.
Saturday, November 18, 2006
How shall we live then?
I've been rather troubled about how I should be living as a christian in terms of my possessions. One of the questions is, should I liquidate all my assets and give them away? How much proportion should I retain, how much should I save? Basically the practical application of living out a godly life.
Quite thankful I read this chapter from Randy Alcon's book tonight. I think it is quite insightful.
Chapt 13
Giving: Reciprocating God's Grace
The most striking characteristic of the early Christians is that they shared all they owned, liquidating their possessions to give to the needy (Acts 2:44-45; 4:32-37). In one verse, we're told, "Much grace was upon them all," and in the next, "There were no needy persons among them." Compare this description with that of Christ's bickering disciples, jockeying for position and unwilling to wash each others' feet (Mark 9L33-34, 10:35-41; Luke 9:46, 22-24; John 13:3-16). Radical giving demonstrates the life-changing power of God.
There are two common errors made in evaluating the first Jerusalem church. One is to see it as a model to be followed by all Christians. The other is to reject it as irrelevant to us today.
Those who see the Jerusalem church as a detailed model fail to understand its unique historical context. Perhaps a million Jews had made the Passover pilgrimage to Jerusalem. The city was bursting at its seams. Many of the thousands coming to Christ wanted to stay in Jerusalem to learn as much as possible before going home. Others probably couldn't return to their homes at all. As a result of following Christ, they would have become "the victims of social and economic ostracism, ecclesiastical excommunication, and national disinheritance. Their business enterprises must in most cases have collapsed in ruins and family bonds been heart-breakingly severed."(Hughes, 1965)
The result was thousands of homeless, jobless people. This was an emergency situation that called for unusual action. It cannot serve as a strict pattern for all Christian communities, because not all congregations are faced with such extreme situations. However, the first Christians' attitude toward money and possessions is a timeless model for all Christians. Second-century Church leader Justin Martyr writes:"We who formerly treasured money and possessions more than anything else now hands over everything we have to a treasury for all and share it with everyone who needs it."
Some groups have followed a communal model and done well, whereas others have found it problematic. I don't oppose attempts to imitate the early Church. To hoard or withhold our resources from the needy is always unscriptural. But the graces of giving and sharing can legitimately take other forms than that of Acts 2 and 4. Although sacrificial giving is an intergral part of all healthy churches, never again in the New Testament do we see it manifested in the same way as in Acts 2-4.
Some have taken these texts to indicate that the early Church rejected the private ownership of property. On the contrary, the liquidation of possessions took place not all at once but "from time to time" (Acts 4:34). It was strictly voluntary. Peter told Ananias and Sapphira that their property was theirs till they sold it, and once they sold it the money was still theirs to use as they wished (Acts 5:3-5). Their sin wasn't in failing to lay everything at the apostles' feet but in claiming they were doing so when they weren't, just so to impress others.
The early Church is not potrayed as utopian. In addition to the situation with Ananias and Sapphira, the Greek and Hebrew Christians quarreled over in-equities in the distribution of food to the needy (Acts 6:1).
The "bread line" of Acts 6 is not a specific pattern for churches, but a reflection of the ongoing effects of the emergency in the fledgling Church. However it demonstrates the high priority of helping the needy and taking organisational steps to do so effectively. It would be a mistake to see Acts 2-4 as a socialistic model, but an even greater mistake to disregard the early Church's example of openhanded giving to the needy.
Giving involved money, but much more. We can give a meal, a house, dress, shovel, bicycle, sewing machine, or any possession. I may give someone a car. Or I may freely loan it to others, or use it to give a ride to my elderly neighbour, or to go buy groceries for a shut-in. There's a great deal of giving that can take place even when I retain ownership-as long as I remind myself that God is the true owner, and I am only his asset manager.
Two cautions are in order. First, we can easily rationalize owning unnecessary things on the grounds that we share them with others. The face that people often invite others out on their boat doesn't necessarily mean that owning a boat is the most strategic ministry use for the money required. We must also be careful that our ownership doesn't involve possessiveness.
Money, Posessions and Eternity
Randy Alcorn
Quite thankful I read this chapter from Randy Alcon's book tonight. I think it is quite insightful.
Chapt 13
Giving: Reciprocating God's Grace
The most striking characteristic of the early Christians is that they shared all they owned, liquidating their possessions to give to the needy (Acts 2:44-45; 4:32-37). In one verse, we're told, "Much grace was upon them all," and in the next, "There were no needy persons among them." Compare this description with that of Christ's bickering disciples, jockeying for position and unwilling to wash each others' feet (Mark 9L33-34, 10:35-41; Luke 9:46, 22-24; John 13:3-16). Radical giving demonstrates the life-changing power of God.
There are two common errors made in evaluating the first Jerusalem church. One is to see it as a model to be followed by all Christians. The other is to reject it as irrelevant to us today.
Those who see the Jerusalem church as a detailed model fail to understand its unique historical context. Perhaps a million Jews had made the Passover pilgrimage to Jerusalem. The city was bursting at its seams. Many of the thousands coming to Christ wanted to stay in Jerusalem to learn as much as possible before going home. Others probably couldn't return to their homes at all. As a result of following Christ, they would have become "the victims of social and economic ostracism, ecclesiastical excommunication, and national disinheritance. Their business enterprises must in most cases have collapsed in ruins and family bonds been heart-breakingly severed."(Hughes, 1965)
The result was thousands of homeless, jobless people. This was an emergency situation that called for unusual action. It cannot serve as a strict pattern for all Christian communities, because not all congregations are faced with such extreme situations. However, the first Christians' attitude toward money and possessions is a timeless model for all Christians. Second-century Church leader Justin Martyr writes:"We who formerly treasured money and possessions more than anything else now hands over everything we have to a treasury for all and share it with everyone who needs it."
Some groups have followed a communal model and done well, whereas others have found it problematic. I don't oppose attempts to imitate the early Church. To hoard or withhold our resources from the needy is always unscriptural. But the graces of giving and sharing can legitimately take other forms than that of Acts 2 and 4. Although sacrificial giving is an intergral part of all healthy churches, never again in the New Testament do we see it manifested in the same way as in Acts 2-4.
Some have taken these texts to indicate that the early Church rejected the private ownership of property. On the contrary, the liquidation of possessions took place not all at once but "from time to time" (Acts 4:34). It was strictly voluntary. Peter told Ananias and Sapphira that their property was theirs till they sold it, and once they sold it the money was still theirs to use as they wished (Acts 5:3-5). Their sin wasn't in failing to lay everything at the apostles' feet but in claiming they were doing so when they weren't, just so to impress others.
The early Church is not potrayed as utopian. In addition to the situation with Ananias and Sapphira, the Greek and Hebrew Christians quarreled over in-equities in the distribution of food to the needy (Acts 6:1).
The "bread line" of Acts 6 is not a specific pattern for churches, but a reflection of the ongoing effects of the emergency in the fledgling Church. However it demonstrates the high priority of helping the needy and taking organisational steps to do so effectively. It would be a mistake to see Acts 2-4 as a socialistic model, but an even greater mistake to disregard the early Church's example of openhanded giving to the needy.
Giving involved money, but much more. We can give a meal, a house, dress, shovel, bicycle, sewing machine, or any possession. I may give someone a car. Or I may freely loan it to others, or use it to give a ride to my elderly neighbour, or to go buy groceries for a shut-in. There's a great deal of giving that can take place even when I retain ownership-as long as I remind myself that God is the true owner, and I am only his asset manager.
Two cautions are in order. First, we can easily rationalize owning unnecessary things on the grounds that we share them with others. The face that people often invite others out on their boat doesn't necessarily mean that owning a boat is the most strategic ministry use for the money required. We must also be careful that our ownership doesn't involve possessiveness.
Money, Posessions and Eternity
Randy Alcorn
Friday, November 17, 2006
Compassion and Hope
A bit of a lag, but nevertheless, stumbled upon this and thought it will be nice to share! :)
I'm sure that gay and homosexual issues are not as simplistic as they sound.
Brian McLaren: Compassion and Hope in the Haggard Scandal
As a representative of the Red Letter Christians, I was asked the other day to participate in an NPR dialogue about the recent resignation of Ted Haggard. Two things struck me about the dialogue.
First, compassion. The tone of the conversation was not glee at the fall of a hypocrite, but rather sadness and empathy at the suffering of a fellow human being - before and after his resignation. I'm sure there has been some glee, both among secular people who saw Ted as their political enemy, and among religious people of a certain type who find it easy and legitimate to disregard the words of I Corinthians 13, the "Golden Rule," and the Sermon on the Mount. I have been especially moved, both on the NPR program and elsewhere, by the compassion expressed by many in the gay community and by many evangelicals, both of whom may have found reasons to respond otherwise.
Second, hope. A number of people on the program expressed hope that this trauma in the evangelical community will increase understanding about the issue of homosexuality, that it will bring to light the complexity and depth of pain experienced by people for whom heterosexual drives are not inborn and exclusive. Perhaps this painful story will help more preachers (like myself) to back away from the easy answers and binary thinking that are so easy to dispense, and to reject the simplistic moralism Jesus diagnosed in the Pharisees, who, he said, loaded up burdens on the backs of others that they themselves couldn't bear. I've met Ted on a few occasions and he impressed me as a compassionate and hopeful person himself. I join millions of people - Christian and non-, straight and gay - who pray for God's presence, strength, and guidance for him and his family - and his church and NAE colleagues too, as they grapple with the complex realities of the human condition which we all share.
It's Sunday as I write these words, and in an hour or so, I'll be in church, and we'll pray, "Lord, have mercy." The older I get, and the more I experience, the more weight and meaning those simple words carry.
Brian McLaren (brianmclaren.net) is an author, speaker, and board chair of Sojourners/Call to Renewal.
I'm sure that gay and homosexual issues are not as simplistic as they sound.
Brian McLaren: Compassion and Hope in the Haggard Scandal
As a representative of the Red Letter Christians, I was asked the other day to participate in an NPR dialogue about the recent resignation of Ted Haggard. Two things struck me about the dialogue.
First, compassion. The tone of the conversation was not glee at the fall of a hypocrite, but rather sadness and empathy at the suffering of a fellow human being - before and after his resignation. I'm sure there has been some glee, both among secular people who saw Ted as their political enemy, and among religious people of a certain type who find it easy and legitimate to disregard the words of I Corinthians 13, the "Golden Rule," and the Sermon on the Mount. I have been especially moved, both on the NPR program and elsewhere, by the compassion expressed by many in the gay community and by many evangelicals, both of whom may have found reasons to respond otherwise.
Second, hope. A number of people on the program expressed hope that this trauma in the evangelical community will increase understanding about the issue of homosexuality, that it will bring to light the complexity and depth of pain experienced by people for whom heterosexual drives are not inborn and exclusive. Perhaps this painful story will help more preachers (like myself) to back away from the easy answers and binary thinking that are so easy to dispense, and to reject the simplistic moralism Jesus diagnosed in the Pharisees, who, he said, loaded up burdens on the backs of others that they themselves couldn't bear. I've met Ted on a few occasions and he impressed me as a compassionate and hopeful person himself. I join millions of people - Christian and non-, straight and gay - who pray for God's presence, strength, and guidance for him and his family - and his church and NAE colleagues too, as they grapple with the complex realities of the human condition which we all share.
It's Sunday as I write these words, and in an hour or so, I'll be in church, and we'll pray, "Lord, have mercy." The older I get, and the more I experience, the more weight and meaning those simple words carry.
Brian McLaren (brianmclaren.net) is an author, speaker, and board chair of Sojourners/Call to Renewal.
Thursday, November 09, 2006
Radical & Ridicule
Just very thankful that God encouraged me today. He confirmed His word through CF.
Been wondering whether I am being too "radical", or how people might view me for how I keep talking about poverty. And wondering if I should tone down a bit. This morning, I felt He was trying to tell me that it doesn't matter what others think, it matters mostly to please Him.
And during CF, a colleague shared about how the world will hate us, and how Jesus wasn't exactly the most comfortable person to be with. He challenges us, challenges people.
So I shall continue.
God, help me to fear U and not fear men. Help me to speak truth. Guard my mouth, let whatever comes out of it bring light. Guard my heart from pride, help me to be humble and ready to learn.
Been wondering whether I am being too "radical", or how people might view me for how I keep talking about poverty. And wondering if I should tone down a bit. This morning, I felt He was trying to tell me that it doesn't matter what others think, it matters mostly to please Him.
And during CF, a colleague shared about how the world will hate us, and how Jesus wasn't exactly the most comfortable person to be with. He challenges us, challenges people.
So I shall continue.
God, help me to fear U and not fear men. Help me to speak truth. Guard my mouth, let whatever comes out of it bring light. Guard my heart from pride, help me to be humble and ready to learn.
Tuesday, November 07, 2006
How vulnerable we all are.
Not sure if u all follow the Ted Haggard saga. But I thought this post was really balanced and kind.
Esp this prayer:
And so I pray: Lord and Father, how sad you must be when you see the most powerful and the weakest of your children fall prey to the energy of sin and evil. There is nothing any one has ever done that we –each of us—is not capable of doing. So when we pray for our brother, Ted Haggard, we pray not out of pity or self-righteousness but with a humble spirit because we stand with him on level ground before the cross. Father, give this man and his wife the gift of your grace. Protect them from the constant accusations of the evil one who will seek to deny them sleep, tempt them to talk too much to the public, arouse conflict between them as a couple and with their children. Send the right people into their lives who can provide the correct mixture of hope and healing love. Deliver them from people who will curry their favor by telling them things they should not hear. Restrain them from making poor judgments in their most fearful moments.
I don't exactly know who this pastor is. But he has responded in a contrite spirit, and I pray that God will keep him from the evil one.
It's just too easy for us to be self righteous and to condemn another isn't it? But "we pray not out of pity or self-righteousness but with a humble spirit because we stand with him on level ground before the cross".
I believe that through his ministry, he must have been a blessing to many people. We can be most sinful, but God uses us to fulfil His purpose anyway.
How we can be critical of homosexuals or outright sinful acts, when hidden in our hearts is also a sinful nature? How vulnerable our christian leaders are to sin. How easy it is for us to critique others.
God, help us. Help him.
Esp this prayer:
And so I pray: Lord and Father, how sad you must be when you see the most powerful and the weakest of your children fall prey to the energy of sin and evil. There is nothing any one has ever done that we –each of us—is not capable of doing. So when we pray for our brother, Ted Haggard, we pray not out of pity or self-righteousness but with a humble spirit because we stand with him on level ground before the cross. Father, give this man and his wife the gift of your grace. Protect them from the constant accusations of the evil one who will seek to deny them sleep, tempt them to talk too much to the public, arouse conflict between them as a couple and with their children. Send the right people into their lives who can provide the correct mixture of hope and healing love. Deliver them from people who will curry their favor by telling them things they should not hear. Restrain them from making poor judgments in their most fearful moments.
I don't exactly know who this pastor is. But he has responded in a contrite spirit, and I pray that God will keep him from the evil one.
It's just too easy for us to be self righteous and to condemn another isn't it? But "we pray not out of pity or self-righteousness but with a humble spirit because we stand with him on level ground before the cross".
I believe that through his ministry, he must have been a blessing to many people. We can be most sinful, but God uses us to fulfil His purpose anyway.
How we can be critical of homosexuals or outright sinful acts, when hidden in our hearts is also a sinful nature? How vulnerable our christian leaders are to sin. How easy it is for us to critique others.
God, help us. Help him.
Saturday, October 28, 2006
Freedom & Detachment
This is from MrForest's blog, which he has kindly allowed me to publish on my blog.
I find it very encouraging to know someone else is on this route as well. ;)
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
FREEDOM & DETACHMENT
I've been attending service at this church near the Stanford campus for the past month and have decided to settle down in there. The preaching is good, the music is fantasic, the people are nice, the distance is perfect. One of the main reasons why I have decided to settle there without even visiting any other church is because I was already too sick of visiting churches. For more than 2 years, I was 'gallivanting' along the 'corridors' of the church, experiencing a load of different emotions -- from anger, disappointment, nausea, helplessness, to freedom. Organized religion can be problematic at times. Oftentimes, I have to separate God from the church because humans can make the church experience very unbearable.
I was reading Time magazine (thanks and courtesy of batthwee!) and the excerpt of Barack Obama's book caught my attention. Although he wrote about something that resonated within me, I was rather reluctant to agree.
"[M]y mother viewed religion through the eyes of the anthropologist that she would become; it was a phenomenon to be treated with a suitable respect, but with a suitable detachment as well... [a]nd yet for all her professed secularism, my mother was in many ways the most spiritually awakened person that I've ever known. She had an unswerving instinct for kindness, charity, sometimes to her detriment. Without the help of religious texts or outside authorities, she worked mightily to instill in me the values that many Americans learn in Sunday school: honesty, empathy, discipline, delayed gratification, and hard work. She raged at poverty and injustice...The Christians with whom I worked recognized themselves in me; they saw that I knew their Book and shared their values and sang their songs. But they sensed a part of me remained removed, detached, an observer among them. I came to realize that without an unequivocal commitment to a particular community of faith, I would be consigned at some level to always remain apart, free in the way my mother was free, but also alone in the same ways she was ultimately alone."
I wanted to illustrate a few points from that excerpt. First, I experienced the same freedom Obama and his mum had. It was something that I have grown to cherish. I no longer have to deal with the dissonance I felt when what I witnessed or heard deviates from what I thought was proper. This is ultimately my relationship with God. I am absolutely clear what my faith is made of, who my God is, and what I stand for. I also do not have the need to provide a response to unenlightened individuals (who can say the meanest things). Godly behavior is independent of involvement with the Christian community. Second, this freedom has a tradeoff -- detachment. The researcher in me makes the switch to the "observer" role almost seamless. As admitted earlier, I was reluctant to agree even though Obama's words resonated, because I have to give up that freedom. This detachment can sometimes really boggle the mind and challenge our taken-for-granted notions of what Christianity stands for, and what being a Christian really means.
As I reflect, I found a different form of freedom. The 2 years of wandering (and wondering) have been the most fruitful years in my Christian walk. Perhaps 'fruitful' may not be the best word to use because I bore no fruit, 'rooted' may be a better word I guess, because my roots deepened. This new freedom comes from the assurance that God alone is my judge. Unenlightened individuals can say whatever they want to say, ultimately, it is still my personal relationship with God and only He and I will know. This new freedom also derives from the fact that I care a lot less about what others think (not in the negative sense) and the new security i found in who I am and who He is. I really know what I am doing. I will serve His people with a new freedom.
As I go back into the community of believers, I am keeping that new freedom and detachment.
I find it very encouraging to know someone else is on this route as well. ;)
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
FREEDOM & DETACHMENT
I've been attending service at this church near the Stanford campus for the past month and have decided to settle down in there. The preaching is good, the music is fantasic, the people are nice, the distance is perfect. One of the main reasons why I have decided to settle there without even visiting any other church is because I was already too sick of visiting churches. For more than 2 years, I was 'gallivanting' along the 'corridors' of the church, experiencing a load of different emotions -- from anger, disappointment, nausea, helplessness, to freedom. Organized religion can be problematic at times. Oftentimes, I have to separate God from the church because humans can make the church experience very unbearable.
I was reading Time magazine (thanks and courtesy of batthwee!) and the excerpt of Barack Obama's book caught my attention. Although he wrote about something that resonated within me, I was rather reluctant to agree.
"[M]y mother viewed religion through the eyes of the anthropologist that she would become; it was a phenomenon to be treated with a suitable respect, but with a suitable detachment as well... [a]nd yet for all her professed secularism, my mother was in many ways the most spiritually awakened person that I've ever known. She had an unswerving instinct for kindness, charity, sometimes to her detriment. Without the help of religious texts or outside authorities, she worked mightily to instill in me the values that many Americans learn in Sunday school: honesty, empathy, discipline, delayed gratification, and hard work. She raged at poverty and injustice...The Christians with whom I worked recognized themselves in me; they saw that I knew their Book and shared their values and sang their songs. But they sensed a part of me remained removed, detached, an observer among them. I came to realize that without an unequivocal commitment to a particular community of faith, I would be consigned at some level to always remain apart, free in the way my mother was free, but also alone in the same ways she was ultimately alone."
I wanted to illustrate a few points from that excerpt. First, I experienced the same freedom Obama and his mum had. It was something that I have grown to cherish. I no longer have to deal with the dissonance I felt when what I witnessed or heard deviates from what I thought was proper. This is ultimately my relationship with God. I am absolutely clear what my faith is made of, who my God is, and what I stand for. I also do not have the need to provide a response to unenlightened individuals (who can say the meanest things). Godly behavior is independent of involvement with the Christian community. Second, this freedom has a tradeoff -- detachment. The researcher in me makes the switch to the "observer" role almost seamless. As admitted earlier, I was reluctant to agree even though Obama's words resonated, because I have to give up that freedom. This detachment can sometimes really boggle the mind and challenge our taken-for-granted notions of what Christianity stands for, and what being a Christian really means.
As I reflect, I found a different form of freedom. The 2 years of wandering (and wondering) have been the most fruitful years in my Christian walk. Perhaps 'fruitful' may not be the best word to use because I bore no fruit, 'rooted' may be a better word I guess, because my roots deepened. This new freedom comes from the assurance that God alone is my judge. Unenlightened individuals can say whatever they want to say, ultimately, it is still my personal relationship with God and only He and I will know. This new freedom also derives from the fact that I care a lot less about what others think (not in the negative sense) and the new security i found in who I am and who He is. I really know what I am doing. I will serve His people with a new freedom.
As I go back into the community of believers, I am keeping that new freedom and detachment.
Tuesday, October 24, 2006
The Lord gave and took...
I think what makes Job stand out in the bible is one of these phrases that he said:
Job 1:21
And he said: "Naked I came from my mother's womb, And naked shall I return there. The Lord gave, and the Lord has taken away; Blessed be the name of the Lord.
It inspired (I think) this song, which we sang during service last week. And it stayed in my mind, cos the first time we sang, I was in tears.
Blessed Be Your Name
by Matt Redman
- - -
Blessed Be Your Name
In the land that is plentiful
Where Your streams of abundance flow
Blessed be Your name
Blessed Be Your name
When I'm found in the desert place
Though I walk through the wilderness
Blessed Be Your name
Every blessing You pour out
I'll turn back to praise
When the darkness closes in, Lord
Still I will say
Blessed be the name of the Lord
Blessed be Your name
Blessed be the name of the Lord
Blessed be Your glorious name
Blessed be Your name
When the sun's shining down on me
When the world's 'all as it should be'
Blessed be Your name
Blessed be Your name
On the road marked with suffering
Though there's pain in the offering
Blessed be Your name
Every blessing You pour out
I'll turn back to praise
When the darkness closes in, Lord
Still I will say
Blessed be the name of the Lord
Blessed be Your name
Blessed be the name of the Lord
Blessed be Your glorious name
You give and take away
You give and take away
My heart will choose to say
Lord, blessed be Your name
I think basically what Job is saying is that- these riches that I have, are from God anyway, and I came in naked on this earth, and there is nothing that I can retain. In my bible, there is a reference to another verse wrt "The Lord gave"- it is in Eccl 5:19
As for every man to whom God has given riches and wealth, and given him power to eat of it, to receive his heritage and rejoice in his labor--this is the gift of God.
Wow! I know that I am living in this upper middle classy life (hmm? Am I?) in Singapore because I know that it is God who has given it to me.
At the same time, couldn't help remembering another verse that says that God causes the rain to fall on both the righteous and the unrighteous. Sometimes we wonder why some people are unrighteously rich? Why, we really will never know.
Basically what I am trying to say is that, be thankful when the Lord blesses u. Yet at the same time, this needs to be balanced with the heart for others, as well as to remember that the possessions that we have should not be held in such high esteem. Learn to be like Job, to praise God inspite of all. To be like Paul- to abase and abound. Power is in the hands of those whom God has blessed with plenty to learn to share, and redirect wealth.
A nice comment by someone, he says we shd give thanks IN all things. And as that thought seeped in- yes, we should be thankful to God whether we are rich or poor. We are not thankful FOR the wealth, but rather being thankful IN the wealth.
In all circumstances yes, blessing God, and praising Him.
Job 1:21
And he said: "Naked I came from my mother's womb, And naked shall I return there. The Lord gave, and the Lord has taken away; Blessed be the name of the Lord.
It inspired (I think) this song, which we sang during service last week. And it stayed in my mind, cos the first time we sang, I was in tears.
Blessed Be Your Name
by Matt Redman
- - -
Blessed Be Your Name
In the land that is plentiful
Where Your streams of abundance flow
Blessed be Your name
Blessed Be Your name
When I'm found in the desert place
Though I walk through the wilderness
Blessed Be Your name
Every blessing You pour out
I'll turn back to praise
When the darkness closes in, Lord
Still I will say
Blessed be the name of the Lord
Blessed be Your name
Blessed be the name of the Lord
Blessed be Your glorious name
Blessed be Your name
When the sun's shining down on me
When the world's 'all as it should be'
Blessed be Your name
Blessed be Your name
On the road marked with suffering
Though there's pain in the offering
Blessed be Your name
Every blessing You pour out
I'll turn back to praise
When the darkness closes in, Lord
Still I will say
Blessed be the name of the Lord
Blessed be Your name
Blessed be the name of the Lord
Blessed be Your glorious name
You give and take away
You give and take away
My heart will choose to say
Lord, blessed be Your name
I think basically what Job is saying is that- these riches that I have, are from God anyway, and I came in naked on this earth, and there is nothing that I can retain. In my bible, there is a reference to another verse wrt "The Lord gave"- it is in Eccl 5:19
As for every man to whom God has given riches and wealth, and given him power to eat of it, to receive his heritage and rejoice in his labor--this is the gift of God.
Wow! I know that I am living in this upper middle classy life (hmm? Am I?) in Singapore because I know that it is God who has given it to me.
At the same time, couldn't help remembering another verse that says that God causes the rain to fall on both the righteous and the unrighteous. Sometimes we wonder why some people are unrighteously rich? Why, we really will never know.
Basically what I am trying to say is that, be thankful when the Lord blesses u. Yet at the same time, this needs to be balanced with the heart for others, as well as to remember that the possessions that we have should not be held in such high esteem. Learn to be like Job, to praise God inspite of all. To be like Paul- to abase and abound. Power is in the hands of those whom God has blessed with plenty to learn to share, and redirect wealth.
A nice comment by someone, he says we shd give thanks IN all things. And as that thought seeped in- yes, we should be thankful to God whether we are rich or poor. We are not thankful FOR the wealth, but rather being thankful IN the wealth.
In all circumstances yes, blessing God, and praising Him.
Saturday, October 21, 2006
Grappling with God
"Like Abraham, I approach God at first in fear and trembling, only to learn that God wants me to stop groveling and start arguing. I dare not meekly accept the state of the world, with all its injustice and unfairness. I must call God to account for God's own promises, God's own character."
Philip Yancey, Prayer: Does It Make Any Difference
Philip Yancey, Prayer: Does It Make Any Difference
Thursday, October 19, 2006
Seeing a bigger picture
Today a director from a local bank came to share during CF. He shared his testimony on his encounters and experiences with the Holy Spirit. He was from a methodist background, and was a very lukewarm christian. But his spiritual life took a turn when he went to Canada. God spoke to him while he was driving in his car and reminded him abt the importance of His word. He also shared of his baptism in the Holy Spirit, how someone told him that there was such a thing. The heat he felt when someone laid hands on his chest and how he felt God just wrapping His arms around him when he got slain.
All the things he shared was so familiar to me, for I have encountered such experiences with the Holy Spirit as well! Laying hands on people and seeing them fall under the power, at the mission trip in china- feeling my hand tremble with electricity vibes running through, prayed for deliverance with girl manifesting even before I laid hands, cg member sharing that she felt heat all over her and light when I prayed for her, moments where I felt His anointing and it was just me and Him alone.
Haha...yeah...God is so real in such supernatural encounters, and my faith is encouraged during those moments, and u just feel as if that it is not you, but it is Him doing the work through you.
I remember that when I first took part of Roy's cg, and saw him laying hands and people getting slain, I was all awed. Heh. I wanted "that" too. The "power" from God to do supernatural things. Yet when I tried and prayed for people, it was as if it was in vain. Nobody moved. I ended up with lengthy prayers, and sometimes gave a word to people that were not really sharp...I wasn't sure abt what to share when I prayed for them too. But I wanted "that" and I asked God....
It was during Benny Hinn's meetings I think when I saw the way he ministered and I understood the importance of waiting. Waiting on the Holy Spirit to come. Inviting Him and making Him feel welcome in the place. And this yearning for Him. A trusting in Him also that it is He who works in and touches people's lives. And so during cg session we just sang worship songs during ministry, very simple songs, and we just sang softly and we waited for His presence. I didn't say much, didn't have to. And it was so glorious, just feeling His anointing fill the place. It is wonderful wonderful. And laying of hands was just a matter of being a steward. Having the trust that it is He who works through me.
Going to China in April this year, during one of the worship sessions that Grace led, everyone just broke down into tears. It was the Holy Spirit touching many hearts, melting many hearts, speaking to people in areas that are so deep that nobody knew. And it was so sharp that when He spoke, people cried. Me too. I remember He spoke to me abt Hebrews, coming boldly into His presence. And then the next days when we had ministry...really all ready to go. Laying of hands and people just fall one by one....and then had inner healing as well. :)
I love the presence of God, and I love to minister the presence of God. I wished somehow that Covenant had more ministry sessions after services. Or that the worship style could be more charismatic.
And yes, I think that for me, I am so deeply convicted that God is real because of these experiences.
However I also remembered some times when I squirmed in the seat of the church because the interpretation of the word was just not contextualised. Today's lunch time sharing as well, I feel that it was not a very accurate interpretation of the Word. It is quite typical of charismatics to have "revelational" truths from reading the Word, and hence sometimes interpretations that are not exactly true to the Word. And how I wish that we can have both! A balanced Word and also a move in the Holy Spirit.
The wonderful amazing thing is how God uses us in our imperfect ways. Given that it is so impt for the Holy Spirit to move and hence we can't quench that...it is the arm that gives power.
Anyway was really good talking to this colleague who was from Church of our Saviour and then went to ARPC after a long long transition journey. And tho ARPC doesn't talk much abt the gifts of the Holy Spirit, these are things he believed in. Yet, he can stay in ARPC and accept these things cos these are not core to him. And one statement he made- if you agree with the church all the time, u don't have yr own relationship with God, cos having yr own r/s means that u seek out and go back and see if what is spoken is true.
And this is so true, there is no perfect church, no perfect humans. Only fallen creatures like us.
If the director was God-sent to speak to traditional christians w/o fresh revelations of who the Holy Spirit was, then I pray that for me- He will use the experience I have and help me speak truth into overly zealous and one sided charismatics.
All the things he shared was so familiar to me, for I have encountered such experiences with the Holy Spirit as well! Laying hands on people and seeing them fall under the power, at the mission trip in china- feeling my hand tremble with electricity vibes running through, prayed for deliverance with girl manifesting even before I laid hands, cg member sharing that she felt heat all over her and light when I prayed for her, moments where I felt His anointing and it was just me and Him alone.
Haha...yeah...God is so real in such supernatural encounters, and my faith is encouraged during those moments, and u just feel as if that it is not you, but it is Him doing the work through you.
I remember that when I first took part of Roy's cg, and saw him laying hands and people getting slain, I was all awed. Heh. I wanted "that" too. The "power" from God to do supernatural things. Yet when I tried and prayed for people, it was as if it was in vain. Nobody moved. I ended up with lengthy prayers, and sometimes gave a word to people that were not really sharp...I wasn't sure abt what to share when I prayed for them too. But I wanted "that" and I asked God....
It was during Benny Hinn's meetings I think when I saw the way he ministered and I understood the importance of waiting. Waiting on the Holy Spirit to come. Inviting Him and making Him feel welcome in the place. And this yearning for Him. A trusting in Him also that it is He who works in and touches people's lives. And so during cg session we just sang worship songs during ministry, very simple songs, and we just sang softly and we waited for His presence. I didn't say much, didn't have to. And it was so glorious, just feeling His anointing fill the place. It is wonderful wonderful. And laying of hands was just a matter of being a steward. Having the trust that it is He who works through me.
Going to China in April this year, during one of the worship sessions that Grace led, everyone just broke down into tears. It was the Holy Spirit touching many hearts, melting many hearts, speaking to people in areas that are so deep that nobody knew. And it was so sharp that when He spoke, people cried. Me too. I remember He spoke to me abt Hebrews, coming boldly into His presence. And then the next days when we had ministry...really all ready to go. Laying of hands and people just fall one by one....and then had inner healing as well. :)
I love the presence of God, and I love to minister the presence of God. I wished somehow that Covenant had more ministry sessions after services. Or that the worship style could be more charismatic.
And yes, I think that for me, I am so deeply convicted that God is real because of these experiences.
However I also remembered some times when I squirmed in the seat of the church because the interpretation of the word was just not contextualised. Today's lunch time sharing as well, I feel that it was not a very accurate interpretation of the Word. It is quite typical of charismatics to have "revelational" truths from reading the Word, and hence sometimes interpretations that are not exactly true to the Word. And how I wish that we can have both! A balanced Word and also a move in the Holy Spirit.
The wonderful amazing thing is how God uses us in our imperfect ways. Given that it is so impt for the Holy Spirit to move and hence we can't quench that...it is the arm that gives power.
Anyway was really good talking to this colleague who was from Church of our Saviour and then went to ARPC after a long long transition journey. And tho ARPC doesn't talk much abt the gifts of the Holy Spirit, these are things he believed in. Yet, he can stay in ARPC and accept these things cos these are not core to him. And one statement he made- if you agree with the church all the time, u don't have yr own relationship with God, cos having yr own r/s means that u seek out and go back and see if what is spoken is true.
And this is so true, there is no perfect church, no perfect humans. Only fallen creatures like us.
If the director was God-sent to speak to traditional christians w/o fresh revelations of who the Holy Spirit was, then I pray that for me- He will use the experience I have and help me speak truth into overly zealous and one sided charismatics.
Tuesday, October 17, 2006
Will we enjoy heaven?
"We might think that the 'virtues' were necessary only for this present life- that in the other world we could stop being brave because there is no danger. Now it is quite true that there will probably be no occasion for just or courageous acts in the next world, but there will be every occasion for being the sort of people that we can become only as the result of doing such acts here. The point is not that God will refuse you admission to His eternal world if you have not got certain qualities of character: the point is that if people have not got at least the beginnings of those qualities inside them, then no possible external conditions could make a 'Heaven' for them- that is, could make them happy with the deep, strong, unshakable kind of happiness God intends for us."
CS Lewis
Mere Christianity
Have u ever pondered what heaven will be like? I have...
I think it was Brian McClaren who suggested that afterlife it may be the same place- but to the sinner walking in darkness, he wouldn't like the brightness in heaven- and hence heaven is like hell to him.
What abt those people who said the sinners prayer 1 min before they passed away, what will heaven be like for them?
Randy Alcorn suggests that we shd invest our treasures in heaven. When we get to heaven, different people will receive different kind of rewards/crowns. This sounds strange to me though. Cos heaven doesn't seem like a place with distinctions to me. Imagine someone who has been a spendthrift on earth, and ends up in a atap house in heaven, while someone else stays in his magnificent 3 storey mansion. That'll be strange wouldn't it? Hence I couldn't really agree with it. Then how does God differentiate people and is there differentiation? Really don't know!
Just some preliminary thoughts...
CS Lewis
Mere Christianity
Have u ever pondered what heaven will be like? I have...
I think it was Brian McClaren who suggested that afterlife it may be the same place- but to the sinner walking in darkness, he wouldn't like the brightness in heaven- and hence heaven is like hell to him.
What abt those people who said the sinners prayer 1 min before they passed away, what will heaven be like for them?
Randy Alcorn suggests that we shd invest our treasures in heaven. When we get to heaven, different people will receive different kind of rewards/crowns. This sounds strange to me though. Cos heaven doesn't seem like a place with distinctions to me. Imagine someone who has been a spendthrift on earth, and ends up in a atap house in heaven, while someone else stays in his magnificent 3 storey mansion. That'll be strange wouldn't it? Hence I couldn't really agree with it. Then how does God differentiate people and is there differentiation? Really don't know!
Just some preliminary thoughts...
Saturday, October 14, 2006
God's absolute goodness and the fix we are in
"And it is no use saying either that if there is a God of that sort- an impersonal absolute goodness- then you do not like Him and are not going to bother about Him. For the trouble is that one part of you is on His side and really agrees with His disapproval of human greed and trickery and exploitation. You may want Him to make an exception in your own case, to let you off this one time; but you know at bottom that unless the power behind the world really and unalterably detests that sort of behaviour, then He cannot be good. On the other hand, we know that if there does exist an absolute goodness it must hate most of what we do. That is the terrible fix we are in. If the universe is not governed by an absolute goodness, then all our efforts are in the long run hopeless. But if it is, then we are making ourselves enemies to that goodness every day, and are not in the least likely to do any better tomorrow, and so our case is hopeless again. We cannot do without it, and we cannot do with it. God is the only comfort, He is also the supreme terror: the thing we most need and the thing we most want to hide from. He is our only possible ally, and we have made ourselves His enemies. Some people talk as if meeting the gaze of absolute goodness would be fun. They need to think again. They are still only playing with religion. Goodness is either the great safety or the great danger- according to the way you react to it. And we have reacted the wrong way."
Mere Christianity
C.S. Lewis
Mere Christianity
C.S. Lewis
Saturday, October 07, 2006
Friday, October 06, 2006
Conversion
When I was around primary 1 or 2, my maid was a catholic who shared with me that Jesus loves me. She taught me how to pray and say grace before my meals. Though I don't really understand this Jesus then, I said good night to God before I slept everyday, and whenever I was upset, I went into the room and cried and prayed to God.
When my friend brought me to church, that was in 1997, december. With eyes closed and heads bowed, Pastor Kong asked if anyone would like to know God as her Lord and saviour, and with the encouragement of Vene, she walked with me down the altar call with her arms around my shoulder.
Well, I think I believed in God but it was a struggle to really believe, I was doubtful and unsure. Hence even after "receiving" Christ, I went down to the altar call a couple of times more subsequently, until Vene told me that it was by faith, and that I didn't have to respond so many times.
I never "felt" God when I first converted, hence I doubted if He existed. Esp when my sister shared with me how she felt rivers of water moving in her tummy when she was prayed for the baptism in the Holy Spirit. Or how ple had holy laughter but not me.
My faith was sealed though when I experienced the touch of God. It was a warm feeling that surrounded me, and I knew God was so real then. And I realised that it was not about seeking the presence, but it was about seeking Him and His presence came naturally. Though people say that charismatics are an emotional lot- I think that emotions are important, for it is that touch that humans relate to. And we can't dismiss everything as being emotional. I remember many lovely times when I just dwelt within His presence, understood His personhood, and the Holy Spirit being so close to me, encouraging me. And it was those times when I had the breakthroughs in my spiritual life, having new revelations from God.
However, I never really understood what conversion meant until much recently. Receiving Christ, yes I did, I received Him into my heart, His love. But most recently I realise that conversion includes repentance. Didn't I know that? Perhaps just the conviction and true realisation of how unworthy I am, and how needy I am of Him. I never understood repentence cos I am not sure what I had to repent of. I didn't steal, kill, have bad attitude. I tithed regularly, went to church, loved my parents and did well in my exams.
I'm thankful for the recent spate of events that took place, and though it was a very painful time for me, I learnt repentance and humility. For the first time, (though I'm sure it was there all along) the impure things hidden in my heart came out in anger, bitterness, loneliness and lust. And I cried out to God in desperation, because there was just no way I could fix this or move on. And then this self righteousness had to go and I come to realise how much I need Him. And repentance-being a giving of our lives. Conversion, not just knowing God loves me, but conversion-is surrendering all of me to Him.
And I am thankful to also understand that christianity is not just an emotion. It is not just abt feeling God. But it is IN SPITE of how we feel, we have faith that God is there, ever present for us.
For a while I swung to the other extreme, being very skeptical and labeling many stuffs as "emotionalism". Because I finally understood also that it can be very very dangerous to be telling people that "God says...", "God is telling you...", "God gave me a vision to...", and in the name of what He spoke to me, I ask others to follow me. Because of that a lot of people dare not question what is really preached at the pulpit-afterall who am I to challenge what "God" has said. But I think it is not like that. It is not just the feelings of high we receive when we jump up and down or shed a few tears.
For true conversion, which includes being touched by God, but also a conscious decision to change our lives. For God is not just a lovely dovey Father or santa claus who comes to hug u when u are wounded. He is also a very Holy God. Hence it is not just giving God a chance in yr life. It is a giving of yr everything.
I'm not sure if u can identify with what I have written. But I am thankful for His love for me. And I know that I mess up, I am so unrighteous, but upheld by His love for me, and I am thankful.
When my friend brought me to church, that was in 1997, december. With eyes closed and heads bowed, Pastor Kong asked if anyone would like to know God as her Lord and saviour, and with the encouragement of Vene, she walked with me down the altar call with her arms around my shoulder.
Well, I think I believed in God but it was a struggle to really believe, I was doubtful and unsure. Hence even after "receiving" Christ, I went down to the altar call a couple of times more subsequently, until Vene told me that it was by faith, and that I didn't have to respond so many times.
I never "felt" God when I first converted, hence I doubted if He existed. Esp when my sister shared with me how she felt rivers of water moving in her tummy when she was prayed for the baptism in the Holy Spirit. Or how ple had holy laughter but not me.
My faith was sealed though when I experienced the touch of God. It was a warm feeling that surrounded me, and I knew God was so real then. And I realised that it was not about seeking the presence, but it was about seeking Him and His presence came naturally. Though people say that charismatics are an emotional lot- I think that emotions are important, for it is that touch that humans relate to. And we can't dismiss everything as being emotional. I remember many lovely times when I just dwelt within His presence, understood His personhood, and the Holy Spirit being so close to me, encouraging me. And it was those times when I had the breakthroughs in my spiritual life, having new revelations from God.
However, I never really understood what conversion meant until much recently. Receiving Christ, yes I did, I received Him into my heart, His love. But most recently I realise that conversion includes repentance. Didn't I know that? Perhaps just the conviction and true realisation of how unworthy I am, and how needy I am of Him. I never understood repentence cos I am not sure what I had to repent of. I didn't steal, kill, have bad attitude. I tithed regularly, went to church, loved my parents and did well in my exams.
I'm thankful for the recent spate of events that took place, and though it was a very painful time for me, I learnt repentance and humility. For the first time, (though I'm sure it was there all along) the impure things hidden in my heart came out in anger, bitterness, loneliness and lust. And I cried out to God in desperation, because there was just no way I could fix this or move on. And then this self righteousness had to go and I come to realise how much I need Him. And repentance-being a giving of our lives. Conversion, not just knowing God loves me, but conversion-is surrendering all of me to Him.
And I am thankful to also understand that christianity is not just an emotion. It is not just abt feeling God. But it is IN SPITE of how we feel, we have faith that God is there, ever present for us.
For a while I swung to the other extreme, being very skeptical and labeling many stuffs as "emotionalism". Because I finally understood also that it can be very very dangerous to be telling people that "God says...", "God is telling you...", "God gave me a vision to...", and in the name of what He spoke to me, I ask others to follow me. Because of that a lot of people dare not question what is really preached at the pulpit-afterall who am I to challenge what "God" has said. But I think it is not like that. It is not just the feelings of high we receive when we jump up and down or shed a few tears.
For true conversion, which includes being touched by God, but also a conscious decision to change our lives. For God is not just a lovely dovey Father or santa claus who comes to hug u when u are wounded. He is also a very Holy God. Hence it is not just giving God a chance in yr life. It is a giving of yr everything.
I'm not sure if u can identify with what I have written. But I am thankful for His love for me. And I know that I mess up, I am so unrighteous, but upheld by His love for me, and I am thankful.
Saturday, September 16, 2006
Fix yr eyes on Jesus
I'm beginning to appreciate this journey that I am going through, God meant everything for good. ;) Listened to a Charles Spurgeon audio sermon just now, and he was talking abt how the law brings sin- cos with the law, we realise how sinful we are, and we cannot meet the requirements of the law without God! And hence when we are convicted of our sins, we realise how really sinful we are, and how in need of mercy we are.
In CHC, I've learnt that we are not "worms" but we are children of God, and we walk in righteousness and boldness. The latter is true of cos. But I think that a contrite heart, and the realisation of how in need of God we are, are necessary ingredients of conversion. For only with repentance comes salvation.
During this period of time I can't tell u how often I feel so condemned and unworthy. It may be a natural process when we realise we are sinful in nature. Yups, and it is probably part of the christian journey, of having our prides broken, and asking for God to be merciful.
Afterall, why did Paul say that of all people he was the chief sinner!
The circumstances are not perfect, but we all have to get on with our lives. Thoughts come into our mind like torrents. We have to filter them, protect our mind, and shield it with all our might. Let it be that even in the midst of the storm, we fix our eyes on Jesus. So the storms may take place on the exterior, but the interior is always still & peaceful, cos it has its eyes on Christ.
People may not be perfect, and offenses WILL come, that's what Jesus said. But guess what, anger is satan's bait for us to sin. Not that we cannot be angry, but we must learn daily not to take offenses personally, and learn to release our pain to God.
Just went to Church of our Saviour. There are things that I liked about it, cos I am used to the charismatic kind of worship, as well as the cell group format. ;) There were ofcos, other things that I am unused to. Hence when my friend asked me how I find it, I could only say "okay". The word "okay" to imply many things. One of which is that a church will never be perfect. If u want to find your fair share of offenses, there will be plenty in the church. That is because God is perfect, but the church is not.
Going on this journey has made me realise how impt it is to fix my eyes on Jesus. No matter what happens, or what christians I meet. These can be said to be peripherals. Because nothing on this earth is perfect. I am more and more critical these days, and I get mad at people for their apathy, or practises. But I must say, be angry if I want to, ultimately, it is to fix my eyes on Jesus, and nothing in this world can shake this relationship between u and the Maker.
Most of all, the time taken to resolve conflicts or quarrel with another christian or ruminating over doctrinal issues could sometimes be better utilised by just walking the talk- doing it, serving people, meeting needs, and helping lives. :)
It will take time for us to figure out what we should do, which ministry to serve in, which occupation to take up. Whatever it is just do something! Do not worry about tmr, live each day as it is, being precious. Each day be a blessing to someone. Start something, do something. We may not have our future all mapped out in front of us, but surely opportunities will come as we take each step of our lives. I must believe this. I have to hold on to this.
Dear God, let me fix my eyes on You. No christian is a lone ranger, for U have called us into a Body. Help me, Help us, as a church, to walk right with You. And make me a blessing to those around me. Thank You Lord. Amen.
In CHC, I've learnt that we are not "worms" but we are children of God, and we walk in righteousness and boldness. The latter is true of cos. But I think that a contrite heart, and the realisation of how in need of God we are, are necessary ingredients of conversion. For only with repentance comes salvation.
During this period of time I can't tell u how often I feel so condemned and unworthy. It may be a natural process when we realise we are sinful in nature. Yups, and it is probably part of the christian journey, of having our prides broken, and asking for God to be merciful.
Afterall, why did Paul say that of all people he was the chief sinner!
The circumstances are not perfect, but we all have to get on with our lives. Thoughts come into our mind like torrents. We have to filter them, protect our mind, and shield it with all our might. Let it be that even in the midst of the storm, we fix our eyes on Jesus. So the storms may take place on the exterior, but the interior is always still & peaceful, cos it has its eyes on Christ.
People may not be perfect, and offenses WILL come, that's what Jesus said. But guess what, anger is satan's bait for us to sin. Not that we cannot be angry, but we must learn daily not to take offenses personally, and learn to release our pain to God.
Just went to Church of our Saviour. There are things that I liked about it, cos I am used to the charismatic kind of worship, as well as the cell group format. ;) There were ofcos, other things that I am unused to. Hence when my friend asked me how I find it, I could only say "okay". The word "okay" to imply many things. One of which is that a church will never be perfect. If u want to find your fair share of offenses, there will be plenty in the church. That is because God is perfect, but the church is not.
Going on this journey has made me realise how impt it is to fix my eyes on Jesus. No matter what happens, or what christians I meet. These can be said to be peripherals. Because nothing on this earth is perfect. I am more and more critical these days, and I get mad at people for their apathy, or practises. But I must say, be angry if I want to, ultimately, it is to fix my eyes on Jesus, and nothing in this world can shake this relationship between u and the Maker.
Most of all, the time taken to resolve conflicts or quarrel with another christian or ruminating over doctrinal issues could sometimes be better utilised by just walking the talk- doing it, serving people, meeting needs, and helping lives. :)
It will take time for us to figure out what we should do, which ministry to serve in, which occupation to take up. Whatever it is just do something! Do not worry about tmr, live each day as it is, being precious. Each day be a blessing to someone. Start something, do something. We may not have our future all mapped out in front of us, but surely opportunities will come as we take each step of our lives. I must believe this. I have to hold on to this.
Dear God, let me fix my eyes on You. No christian is a lone ranger, for U have called us into a Body. Help me, Help us, as a church, to walk right with You. And make me a blessing to those around me. Thank You Lord. Amen.
Sunday, September 10, 2006
Nice quote!
"God has richly blessed us financially not so that we can show ourselves to be his children by living above the standards of others, but so that we can show ourselves to be his children by coming down a few rungs on the ladder of affluence and bringing others up a few rungs, that there might be true, from-the-heart equality."
Money, Possessions & Eternity
Randy Alcorn
Money, Possessions & Eternity
Randy Alcorn
Sunday, September 03, 2006
The other side of the story..
I've been talking so much abt finances and money, and opposing the "prosperity" gospel. But to be fair, I have to talk abt the other side of the story. I'm not really going to be quoting any verses, but these are just some of my thoughts from what I've experienced.
CHC is indeed a very giving church, and I know that in the years where I've been there, when it came to building fund and missions fund, a lot of us gave our very best. Some of us give so much that our bank account only had a few dollars left- trusting that God will honour us back as we give to Him.
In order for ple to give a lot- they must have the faith that God will provide. And I think that ple really do need to know that! To learn to trust in God's provision.
I believe that God works through our faith. I also believe that as we give, He will always provide for us. Though the part that I am uncomfortable is emphasizing on the blessings that we will get if we give. I think emphasizing on what we can receive seems a bit transactional to me- giving so that u can receive. As opposed to, I know God will provide for me even as I give, but most of all, I give because I love Him.
I am also uncomfy with the question "How many of u want to be rich?" Pastors always a link we want to be rich to be a blessing, but sometimes it is so hard to draw the linkage.
Most of all, I think God sees our hearts. Whether we are dumping our money in the offering so that we can be rich (smtimes it seems to be implied that way from the sermons), or whether we really give with the right hearts/attitudes.
CHC is indeed a very giving church, and I know that in the years where I've been there, when it came to building fund and missions fund, a lot of us gave our very best. Some of us give so much that our bank account only had a few dollars left- trusting that God will honour us back as we give to Him.
In order for ple to give a lot- they must have the faith that God will provide. And I think that ple really do need to know that! To learn to trust in God's provision.
I believe that God works through our faith. I also believe that as we give, He will always provide for us. Though the part that I am uncomfortable is emphasizing on the blessings that we will get if we give. I think emphasizing on what we can receive seems a bit transactional to me- giving so that u can receive. As opposed to, I know God will provide for me even as I give, but most of all, I give because I love Him.
I am also uncomfy with the question "How many of u want to be rich?" Pastors always a link we want to be rich to be a blessing, but sometimes it is so hard to draw the linkage.
Most of all, I think God sees our hearts. Whether we are dumping our money in the offering so that we can be rich (smtimes it seems to be implied that way from the sermons), or whether we really give with the right hearts/attitudes.
Saturday, September 02, 2006
I've to let this go..
Hello hello..yr Target?
Yr Forecast?
Attendance is low, can u all try to bring more...?
"Hello...hey check with u something, what is yr average prayer hour?"
A: "Hello...hey, are you going for the prayer meeting?"
B: "Nope, I'm not... I gotto take care of my mum at home."
C: "Er...hmm...try and go la. Have faith. The prayer meeting will be good."
Communication is an art.
If u miss that, it is going to come out as pressure and not love.
Fang says that mature christians/ leaders will know what is the heart of the pastor. It is not for numbers, but it is for souls. For individuals to come to know God.
Question is, when systems are in place, numbers are to be submitted, how can one ensure that he keeps his heart on the right focus?
I failed. It wasn't me at all, to lecture ple for their legitimate reasons for not going for cg/service. I don't have a conviction in my heart that attendance measured a person's spirituality. But then in my heart, when someone told me he couldn't come, naturally I would think.. sigh, attendance dropped.
I started to dislike myself for thinking that way. Its shdn't be that way at all. What are are concerned about and who are u working for, XJ???
In my search for perfection in everything I did, I was angry with myself for a long time. My conscious bugged me. Is this what being a christian is all about?
What makes a man a christian? Is it by his attendance for activities?
Who can judge a man but God.
Leaders are mere facilitators, mere servants of God.
We are nothing. When we begin to think we are something, we are finished.
When we begin to apply man-made traditions on ple, and man-made judgements/rituals to follow, we put bondages on people.
Man-made systems are not perfect, and neither is man. I am ashamed to say, I've done things wrongly. But thank God for the grace to step down, to start all over again. :)
I care a lot about how ple view me, abt how they view my "spiritual condition". That's because I think ple judge others by what they do on the outside. I know I am not perfect, and I try hard to prevent myself from bitterness. I almost try and justify myself and wanna shout it out- I am doing spiritually okay! But what defines spiritually okay anyway?
I have to be true to myself, and I am who I am. There are things I love that others don't. There're preferences I have that make me unique. And this is me.
Yr Forecast?
Attendance is low, can u all try to bring more...?
"Hello...hey check with u something, what is yr average prayer hour?"
A: "Hello...hey, are you going for the prayer meeting?"
B: "Nope, I'm not... I gotto take care of my mum at home."
C: "Er...hmm...try and go la. Have faith. The prayer meeting will be good."
Communication is an art.
If u miss that, it is going to come out as pressure and not love.
Fang says that mature christians/ leaders will know what is the heart of the pastor. It is not for numbers, but it is for souls. For individuals to come to know God.
Question is, when systems are in place, numbers are to be submitted, how can one ensure that he keeps his heart on the right focus?
I failed. It wasn't me at all, to lecture ple for their legitimate reasons for not going for cg/service. I don't have a conviction in my heart that attendance measured a person's spirituality. But then in my heart, when someone told me he couldn't come, naturally I would think.. sigh, attendance dropped.
I started to dislike myself for thinking that way. Its shdn't be that way at all. What are are concerned about and who are u working for, XJ???
In my search for perfection in everything I did, I was angry with myself for a long time. My conscious bugged me. Is this what being a christian is all about?
What makes a man a christian? Is it by his attendance for activities?
Who can judge a man but God.
Leaders are mere facilitators, mere servants of God.
We are nothing. When we begin to think we are something, we are finished.
When we begin to apply man-made traditions on ple, and man-made judgements/rituals to follow, we put bondages on people.
Man-made systems are not perfect, and neither is man. I am ashamed to say, I've done things wrongly. But thank God for the grace to step down, to start all over again. :)
I care a lot about how ple view me, abt how they view my "spiritual condition". That's because I think ple judge others by what they do on the outside. I know I am not perfect, and I try hard to prevent myself from bitterness. I almost try and justify myself and wanna shout it out- I am doing spiritually okay! But what defines spiritually okay anyway?
I have to be true to myself, and I am who I am. There are things I love that others don't. There're preferences I have that make me unique. And this is me.
Thursday, August 31, 2006
On the Cross again :)
But who would be the first to comfort? Why, the first to suffer! Who would be the first to speak of the cross with great power and great conviction? (That is, who would be able to speak of the cross with words firmly set in reality?) Who would be the first to declare resurrection? Only one who had died. Who would comfort, except the comforted? Who would heal, except the healed? Who would wield power? None, except those who had been made terribly weak. Who would shield us from legalism and law, except he who had had that beast broken in the depths of his very own nature? Who would pour out his life in long hours of counseling, guidance, direction, except the one who had gained a great deal of counsel, guidance and direction...slowly, painfully, richly...
But why does God permit such suffering to befall his bride?
This suffering produces gold in the lives of those individuals who suffer. That gold, in each life, is then blended into the body of Christ to make the bride what she ought to be.
Careful, Chris, the very thing that you are now rebelling against just might be in perfect harmony with the Lord. What you see and feel so painfully may be the Lord's effort to polish a stone.
Greatly rejoice
Right now you must suffer a little bit.
But these sufferings
These tests of your faith
Are worth a great deal more than gold.
Survive this
And your faith will be proven genuine
And the result will be praise and glory and honor. (1 Pet 1:6-7)
....
It has been given to you,
Not only to believe on him,
But also to suffer for his sake (Philippians 1:29)
One day you are going to look back over your life to recall to mind many an incident. I trust that most of what you remember will be the joys. But remembrances of dark sorrows will surely be included. Whichever tips the balance, remember you will never know how much you owe to suffering. You may even be surprised at just how little the rich blessings and joy have contributed to your growth in divine life. Be sure, some of the greatest blessings yr life will ever know, some of the deepest revelation you will ever peer into, some of the most cherished works the Lord will ever do in your life, yes, the things you hold most dear, were but the child of your greatest sorrow!
One day you will make a chance remark to another believer and be very surprised to discover that your remark deeply blesses and enriches his life. On another occasion, with another Christian whose heart is about to break, you will share something that will change his night to die. You will pause, wonder, and then remember where it was you found that word of wisdom, that oil of comfort.
If you could trace the source, you would find that virtually every help you have ever received- whether it has been from the hands of some brother, or from some word in Christian literature, or perhaps from the scripture- was passed on to you from out of sorrow's fiery furnance and from beneath the bludgeoning blows of suffering's hammer.
Sorrow does have its compensation.
We comfort others, With the comfort that came to us (2 Cor 1:5)
Imagine a distraught, perplexed and broken hearted Paul imprisoned in Rome and addressing a church in a city hundreds of miles away. It is a church he has never seen, and this is what he tells them:
You are rejoicing and filled with praise. You are doing well in Colossae. Why? Because I, Paul, here in Rome, Am taking suffering that was actually meant for you. I am taking that suffering into my very own body, and that has freed you. You are not suffering; you are rejoicing. The pain destined for you lies here in Rome And is now in me.
Suffering meant for believers in Colossae was being absorbed in Rome by Paul. He agonized while they gloried.
But even these are not the last of his mind boggling words. He pressed on to say, 'For this, I was made a minister.'
Paul saw himself as one who was to take up part of the sufferings that really belonged to the church. For this purpose- this incredible purpose- he was made minister....
Now I rejoice in my sufferings. They are for your sake. In my body I am doing my part for his body to complete what is not finished of Christ's afflictions. (Col 1:24)
[24 I now rejoice in my sufferings for you, and fill up in my flesh what is lacking in the afflictions of Christ, for the sake of His body, which is the church, 25 of which I became a minister according to the stewardship from God which was given to me for you, to fulfill the word of God ]
CHrist did not finish his sufferings while here on earth? There is more suffering for him to complete? Is this what Paul is telling us? And is he saying that he, Paul, could complete those sufferings? Or at least play a part in seeing that those sufferings are completed? The mind drowns in the idea.
Jesus Christ did not complete his early sufferings- incredible!
...
It has been given to the church to complete the sufferings of Christ.
There is Christ who is the Head...that is, he who lived upon the earth, who was crucified, rose and ascended and now reigns. But there is another part of Christ. There is a part of Christ that is right here, right now, upon the earth today- visible-potraying Christ daily before the entire world. I speak of the physical, visible body of Christ. You see, the body is also Christ. The body, which is the church, is part of that Christ. ..
There is one aspect of the cross that none of us will ever know-praise God! We will never know what it means to be the sin bearer. That is one thing I will never experience, nor will you.
The Inward Journey
Gene Edwards
----
Now I understand better what these verses means:
3 Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies and God of all comfort, 4 who comforts us in all our tribulation, that we may be able to comfort those who are in any trouble, with the comfort with which we ourselves are comforted by God. 5 For as the sufferings of Christ abound in us, so our consolation also abounds through Christ. 6 Now if we are afflicted, it is for your consolation and salvation, which is effective for enduring the same sufferings which we also suffer. Or if we are comforted, it is for your consolation and salvation.
7 And our hope for you is steadfast, because we know that as you are partakers of the sufferings, so also you will partake of the consolation.
-2 Cor 1:3-7
35 Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall tribulation, or distress, or persecution, or famine, or nakedness, or peril, or sword? 36 As it is written: "For Your sake we are killed all day long; We are accounted as sheep for the slaughter." F22 37 Yet in all these things we are more than conquerors through Him who loved us. 38 For I am persuaded that neither death nor life, nor angels nor principalities nor powers, nor things present nor things to come, 39 nor height nor depth, nor any other created thing, shall be able to separate us from the love of God which is in Christ Jesus our Lord.
-Rom 8:35-39
In case u get the above wrong, its not suffering for suffering per se, or the mentality of a victim. We are victorious in Christ. Though, we will go thru persecution for His name's sake, or He allows us to go thru the fire to build our character. :)
But why does God permit such suffering to befall his bride?
This suffering produces gold in the lives of those individuals who suffer. That gold, in each life, is then blended into the body of Christ to make the bride what she ought to be.
Careful, Chris, the very thing that you are now rebelling against just might be in perfect harmony with the Lord. What you see and feel so painfully may be the Lord's effort to polish a stone.
Greatly rejoice
Right now you must suffer a little bit.
But these sufferings
These tests of your faith
Are worth a great deal more than gold.
Survive this
And your faith will be proven genuine
And the result will be praise and glory and honor. (1 Pet 1:6-7)
....
It has been given to you,
Not only to believe on him,
But also to suffer for his sake (Philippians 1:29)
One day you are going to look back over your life to recall to mind many an incident. I trust that most of what you remember will be the joys. But remembrances of dark sorrows will surely be included. Whichever tips the balance, remember you will never know how much you owe to suffering. You may even be surprised at just how little the rich blessings and joy have contributed to your growth in divine life. Be sure, some of the greatest blessings yr life will ever know, some of the deepest revelation you will ever peer into, some of the most cherished works the Lord will ever do in your life, yes, the things you hold most dear, were but the child of your greatest sorrow!
One day you will make a chance remark to another believer and be very surprised to discover that your remark deeply blesses and enriches his life. On another occasion, with another Christian whose heart is about to break, you will share something that will change his night to die. You will pause, wonder, and then remember where it was you found that word of wisdom, that oil of comfort.
If you could trace the source, you would find that virtually every help you have ever received- whether it has been from the hands of some brother, or from some word in Christian literature, or perhaps from the scripture- was passed on to you from out of sorrow's fiery furnance and from beneath the bludgeoning blows of suffering's hammer.
Sorrow does have its compensation.
We comfort others, With the comfort that came to us (2 Cor 1:5)
Imagine a distraught, perplexed and broken hearted Paul imprisoned in Rome and addressing a church in a city hundreds of miles away. It is a church he has never seen, and this is what he tells them:
You are rejoicing and filled with praise. You are doing well in Colossae. Why? Because I, Paul, here in Rome, Am taking suffering that was actually meant for you. I am taking that suffering into my very own body, and that has freed you. You are not suffering; you are rejoicing. The pain destined for you lies here in Rome And is now in me.
Suffering meant for believers in Colossae was being absorbed in Rome by Paul. He agonized while they gloried.
But even these are not the last of his mind boggling words. He pressed on to say, 'For this, I was made a minister.'
Paul saw himself as one who was to take up part of the sufferings that really belonged to the church. For this purpose- this incredible purpose- he was made minister....
Now I rejoice in my sufferings. They are for your sake. In my body I am doing my part for his body to complete what is not finished of Christ's afflictions. (Col 1:24)
[24 I now rejoice in my sufferings for you, and fill up in my flesh what is lacking in the afflictions of Christ, for the sake of His body, which is the church, 25 of which I became a minister according to the stewardship from God which was given to me for you, to fulfill the word of God ]
CHrist did not finish his sufferings while here on earth? There is more suffering for him to complete? Is this what Paul is telling us? And is he saying that he, Paul, could complete those sufferings? Or at least play a part in seeing that those sufferings are completed? The mind drowns in the idea.
Jesus Christ did not complete his early sufferings- incredible!
...
It has been given to the church to complete the sufferings of Christ.
There is Christ who is the Head...that is, he who lived upon the earth, who was crucified, rose and ascended and now reigns. But there is another part of Christ. There is a part of Christ that is right here, right now, upon the earth today- visible-potraying Christ daily before the entire world. I speak of the physical, visible body of Christ. You see, the body is also Christ. The body, which is the church, is part of that Christ. ..
There is one aspect of the cross that none of us will ever know-praise God! We will never know what it means to be the sin bearer. That is one thing I will never experience, nor will you.
The Inward Journey
Gene Edwards
----
Now I understand better what these verses means:
3 Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies and God of all comfort, 4 who comforts us in all our tribulation, that we may be able to comfort those who are in any trouble, with the comfort with which we ourselves are comforted by God. 5 For as the sufferings of Christ abound in us, so our consolation also abounds through Christ. 6 Now if we are afflicted, it is for your consolation and salvation, which is effective for enduring the same sufferings which we also suffer. Or if we are comforted, it is for your consolation and salvation.
7 And our hope for you is steadfast, because we know that as you are partakers of the sufferings, so also you will partake of the consolation.
-2 Cor 1:3-7
35 Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall tribulation, or distress, or persecution, or famine, or nakedness, or peril, or sword? 36 As it is written: "For Your sake we are killed all day long; We are accounted as sheep for the slaughter." F22 37 Yet in all these things we are more than conquerors through Him who loved us. 38 For I am persuaded that neither death nor life, nor angels nor principalities nor powers, nor things present nor things to come, 39 nor height nor depth, nor any other created thing, shall be able to separate us from the love of God which is in Christ Jesus our Lord.
-Rom 8:35-39
In case u get the above wrong, its not suffering for suffering per se, or the mentality of a victim. We are victorious in Christ. Though, we will go thru persecution for His name's sake, or He allows us to go thru the fire to build our character. :)
Sunday, August 27, 2006
Remove and Replace
Had a good service today at Covenant. Really blessed by the sermon today by Ps Edmund Chan. :) Praise and Worship was good too, haha..cos they sang Hillsongs! Yay!
I guess what I really like about Covenant is the emphasis on being "in" Christ. Being a christian not as a performance driven kind of thing, but really, it is God who moulds us and grows us and makes us change. It is a gift! It isn't so much of our own labour or achievement to be more and more spiritual. So the emphasis is not on recruiting ple to ministry, or to attend this or that, to make ple give money, but rather, the emphasis on changing ple on the inside- leading them towards radical change in their behaviour.
He made a statement that really convicted my heart, that "God's work in us, must preceed His work through us". Really true! Its not about starting with the mindset that I (capital and bold- emphasis on self) am going to slay goliaths, do great things for God...I me and myself. But it is abt starting with the mindset that God- I can do nothing except IN You!! Hence it is of utmost importance that God works within our hearts first, whereby we come to this place of surrender, obedience, and where we may lay down our pride...all glory goes to Him. Its not about the goliaths that WE have slain. Its all about obedience toward Him, and being His tools.
Really exciting, met up with Benny, ex-chef of Goshen Restaurant just now too. He is going to start a Fifteen Restaurant equivalent in Singapore! :) Genuinely very happy for that to happen. Youths must be given a direction and purpose. That is so impt! One day I hope that the model will include depressed kids as well.
I guess what I really like about Covenant is the emphasis on being "in" Christ. Being a christian not as a performance driven kind of thing, but really, it is God who moulds us and grows us and makes us change. It is a gift! It isn't so much of our own labour or achievement to be more and more spiritual. So the emphasis is not on recruiting ple to ministry, or to attend this or that, to make ple give money, but rather, the emphasis on changing ple on the inside- leading them towards radical change in their behaviour.
He made a statement that really convicted my heart, that "God's work in us, must preceed His work through us". Really true! Its not about starting with the mindset that I (capital and bold- emphasis on self) am going to slay goliaths, do great things for God...I me and myself. But it is abt starting with the mindset that God- I can do nothing except IN You!! Hence it is of utmost importance that God works within our hearts first, whereby we come to this place of surrender, obedience, and where we may lay down our pride...all glory goes to Him. Its not about the goliaths that WE have slain. Its all about obedience toward Him, and being His tools.
Really exciting, met up with Benny, ex-chef of Goshen Restaurant just now too. He is going to start a Fifteen Restaurant equivalent in Singapore! :) Genuinely very happy for that to happen. Youths must be given a direction and purpose. That is so impt! One day I hope that the model will include depressed kids as well.
Saturday, August 26, 2006
Prosperity and Provincialism
"I've thought a lot about prosperity theology. I thought about it as I walked through the streets of Cairo's Garbage Village, shaking the grimy hands of Christians living in abject poverty. I thought about it when I worshipped along faithful believers on a rough backless bench in a dirt-floor church in Kenya. I thought about it again when I sat in a dim room with pastors behind the Iron Curtain. I thought of it when I walked down muddy backstreets in Cambodia and squeezed into tiny homes in China. I thought about it as I was flown across the United States, put up in a plush hotel room, and picked up in a limousine that drove me to a Christian television studio for a twenty minute interview...
My novel Safely Home is the story of a U.S. businessman and his Chinese roommate who graduated from Harvard together twenty five years before. They haven't communicated with each other for two decades but are suddenly reunitied in China. The one who has followed Christ is experiencing adversity and joy. The one who turned from Christ is experiencing prosperity and emptiness. The contrast between these two old friends is the contrast between biblical Christianity and prosperity theology...
In America, a sharp looking businessman stands up at a luncheon to give his testimony: 'Before I knew Christ, I had nothing. My business was in bankruptcy, my health was ruined, I'd lost the respect of the community, and I'd almost lost my family. Then I accepted Christ. He took me out of bankruptcy and now my business has tripled its profits. My blood pressure has dropped to normal and I feel better than I've felt in years. Best of all, my wife and children have come back, and we're a family again. God is good-praise the Lord!'
In China, a disheveled former university professor gives his testimony. 'Before I met Christ, I had everything. I made a large salary, lived in a nice house, enjoyed good health, was highly respected for my credentials and profession, and had a good marriage and a beautiful son. Then I accepted Christ as my Saviour and Lord. As a result, I lost my post in the university, lost my beautiful house and car, and spent five years in prison. Now I work for a subsistence wage at a factory. I live with pain in my neck, which was broken in prison. My wife rejected me bacause of my conversion. She took my son away and I haven't seen him for ten years. But God is good, and I praise Him for His faithfulness.'
Both men are sincere Christians. One gives thanks beacause of what he's gained. The other gives thanks in spite of what he's lost.
Material blessings and restored families are defintely worth being thankful for. The brother in China would be grateful to have them again; indeed, he gives heartfelt thanks each day for the little he does have. And while the American brother is certainly right to give thanks, he and the rest of us must be careful to sort out how much of what he has experienced is part of the gospel and how much is not. For any gospel that is more true in America that in China is not the true gospel."
From Money Possessions & Eternity- Randy Alcorn
Dear God,
If I am wrong about this pls correct me and speak to me. If this is the truth then pls convict my dear brothers and sisters who are reading this. Protect us from the evil one and any distortion from Your truth.
Thank You Lord.
My novel Safely Home is the story of a U.S. businessman and his Chinese roommate who graduated from Harvard together twenty five years before. They haven't communicated with each other for two decades but are suddenly reunitied in China. The one who has followed Christ is experiencing adversity and joy. The one who turned from Christ is experiencing prosperity and emptiness. The contrast between these two old friends is the contrast between biblical Christianity and prosperity theology...
In America, a sharp looking businessman stands up at a luncheon to give his testimony: 'Before I knew Christ, I had nothing. My business was in bankruptcy, my health was ruined, I'd lost the respect of the community, and I'd almost lost my family. Then I accepted Christ. He took me out of bankruptcy and now my business has tripled its profits. My blood pressure has dropped to normal and I feel better than I've felt in years. Best of all, my wife and children have come back, and we're a family again. God is good-praise the Lord!'
In China, a disheveled former university professor gives his testimony. 'Before I met Christ, I had everything. I made a large salary, lived in a nice house, enjoyed good health, was highly respected for my credentials and profession, and had a good marriage and a beautiful son. Then I accepted Christ as my Saviour and Lord. As a result, I lost my post in the university, lost my beautiful house and car, and spent five years in prison. Now I work for a subsistence wage at a factory. I live with pain in my neck, which was broken in prison. My wife rejected me bacause of my conversion. She took my son away and I haven't seen him for ten years. But God is good, and I praise Him for His faithfulness.'
Both men are sincere Christians. One gives thanks beacause of what he's gained. The other gives thanks in spite of what he's lost.
Material blessings and restored families are defintely worth being thankful for. The brother in China would be grateful to have them again; indeed, he gives heartfelt thanks each day for the little he does have. And while the American brother is certainly right to give thanks, he and the rest of us must be careful to sort out how much of what he has experienced is part of the gospel and how much is not. For any gospel that is more true in America that in China is not the true gospel."
From Money Possessions & Eternity- Randy Alcorn
Dear God,
If I am wrong about this pls correct me and speak to me. If this is the truth then pls convict my dear brothers and sisters who are reading this. Protect us from the evil one and any distortion from Your truth.
Thank You Lord.
Monday, August 21, 2006
Joy in prayer
Found this link in a friend's blog, quite blessed by it:
http://gregscouch.homestead.com/files/Quiet_Time_Guilt.htm
It's so true, I often feel guilty or like a "bad" christian when I don't spend enough quiet time with God. But this author challenges us to seek God, not out of legalism. :)
http://gregscouch.homestead.com/files/Quiet_Time_Guilt.htm
It's so true, I often feel guilty or like a "bad" christian when I don't spend enough quiet time with God. But this author challenges us to seek God, not out of legalism. :)
Sunday, August 20, 2006
This is me...
Yup. U came to the right blog. I figured that the old skin was too tough to read all my long blogs, and hopefully this is more reader frenly. :) I'm not sure who comes here anyway.
I went to Covenant instead today. Cos yup, I didn't want to face the pain of disagreeing. This is me- sometimes when something bothers me, it can sit in me for hrs and hrs, and it goes around in a loop in my mind, and makes me feel bad. This lingering feeling from yesterday night..yes, it remains and it bothers me.
Covenant was okay today. One thing I really miss is the worship at CHC, and yup, it just brings me right into the presence of God. Whereas at Covenant, most ple are comfortable putting their hands behind their backs of just clasping them together, or putting them at the side, I instinctively reach out my two hands- and this to me feels like worship. Don't be mistaken here, I am not saying that is the right way, but it is more of a comfort thing.
There are lots of possibilities in this world. And ple who make things happen are not those who indulge in the negative. But they look beyond the negative and see the possibilities. That's what I am trying to do. Focusing on the negative= church-less, relationship-less, and blurred future. But focusing on the positive- reminding myself that yes, God is bringing me to a new place of closeness with Him thru this season, and there are so many doors that He is opening up for me wrt work. :)
Did a google on Dr. AR Bernard, and discovered some interesting things, like how he stood up for truth and talked abt the white church failing wrt racial equality (smthing along that lines). His church building is a big complex complete with cafe and garden and all. Yet, the church also build schools, and helps the poor in New York. So yep, I've come to the realisation that there can be beliefs A, B and C. Person X may believe in ABC, but person Y believes in AC, and Z in AB. And that creates a whole lot of spectrum of differences wrt how XYZ views life, and how he shd live as a christian. Nevertheless, there are always things to learn from each other, and different aspects of each church that are strong and we can be encouraged by. I hope this makes sense.
So looking at possibilities, its just exploding all the way. :) Dear God lead me in Yr truth. Help me to focus on the major and not the minor. Help me to do what is right, not being distracted or losing energy on the things that go around me.
Today's sermon on finishing well...on the test of reality. Whether or not we are satisfied in God or in other stuffs. Ya, there are still so many things that are holding me back in my heart...there's portion that still needs to be surrendered to God. And it is so difficult to find total satisfaction in Christ alone. Afterall, God said it was not good for men to be alone. ;)It is within our nature to feel lonely etc. I really hope that I can seek Christ first over and above all other things that I desire.
I went to Covenant instead today. Cos yup, I didn't want to face the pain of disagreeing. This is me- sometimes when something bothers me, it can sit in me for hrs and hrs, and it goes around in a loop in my mind, and makes me feel bad. This lingering feeling from yesterday night..yes, it remains and it bothers me.
Covenant was okay today. One thing I really miss is the worship at CHC, and yup, it just brings me right into the presence of God. Whereas at Covenant, most ple are comfortable putting their hands behind their backs of just clasping them together, or putting them at the side, I instinctively reach out my two hands- and this to me feels like worship. Don't be mistaken here, I am not saying that is the right way, but it is more of a comfort thing.
There are lots of possibilities in this world. And ple who make things happen are not those who indulge in the negative. But they look beyond the negative and see the possibilities. That's what I am trying to do. Focusing on the negative= church-less, relationship-less, and blurred future. But focusing on the positive- reminding myself that yes, God is bringing me to a new place of closeness with Him thru this season, and there are so many doors that He is opening up for me wrt work. :)
Did a google on Dr. AR Bernard, and discovered some interesting things, like how he stood up for truth and talked abt the white church failing wrt racial equality (smthing along that lines). His church building is a big complex complete with cafe and garden and all. Yet, the church also build schools, and helps the poor in New York. So yep, I've come to the realisation that there can be beliefs A, B and C. Person X may believe in ABC, but person Y believes in AC, and Z in AB. And that creates a whole lot of spectrum of differences wrt how XYZ views life, and how he shd live as a christian. Nevertheless, there are always things to learn from each other, and different aspects of each church that are strong and we can be encouraged by. I hope this makes sense.
So looking at possibilities, its just exploding all the way. :) Dear God lead me in Yr truth. Help me to focus on the major and not the minor. Help me to do what is right, not being distracted or losing energy on the things that go around me.
Today's sermon on finishing well...on the test of reality. Whether or not we are satisfied in God or in other stuffs. Ya, there are still so many things that are holding me back in my heart...there's portion that still needs to be surrendered to God. And it is so difficult to find total satisfaction in Christ alone. Afterall, God said it was not good for men to be alone. ;)It is within our nature to feel lonely etc. I really hope that I can seek Christ first over and above all other things that I desire.
Saturday, August 19, 2006
It's really tuff...
Just went to Dr. AR Bernard's session at CHC, and will go again tmr. Was really blessed once again by his wisdom on social order and how God wanted to restore social order again...on earth, so that the world can function as what God originally inspired. Truly very inspiring. :) And he talked abt how God will use us to speak to men in authority, so that these men in authority can also influence and change culture. Reminds me of how God is opening doors for me in the co. to speak to the director.
But at the end of the msg, I think I couldn't identify with Pastor Kong's conclusion on the sermon cos I kinda had a diff conclusion about it. I think Dr. Bernard wasn't trying to get at us being the top lawyer/business person etc, but really abt the wisdom of God in diff situations in reaching out to individuals. How God can use us to influence ple in authority, so I may just be a small secretary in the office yet, God will open doors for me to speak to my boss in authority. Its really abt wisdom of God and this awareness that God is working in every person's life, and we are partners with Him. Its not really about us being the best this and top that in our industry.
It's really tuff thinking differently from other ple, its like u got some disease or something, or u ate some pills that makes u see the world in different colour. When I went back home and discussed with my sis, she said I was quite skewed in my thinking, and that after a while we stopped discussing cos it got uncomfortable. I really don't know why I have to go around explaining to ple my stand. And it is really tuff and painful to be different from the rest. I am really not very secure I guess. It gets lonely being different. :( And tiring.
But at the end of the msg, I think I couldn't identify with Pastor Kong's conclusion on the sermon cos I kinda had a diff conclusion about it. I think Dr. Bernard wasn't trying to get at us being the top lawyer/business person etc, but really abt the wisdom of God in diff situations in reaching out to individuals. How God can use us to influence ple in authority, so I may just be a small secretary in the office yet, God will open doors for me to speak to my boss in authority. Its really abt wisdom of God and this awareness that God is working in every person's life, and we are partners with Him. Its not really about us being the best this and top that in our industry.
It's really tuff thinking differently from other ple, its like u got some disease or something, or u ate some pills that makes u see the world in different colour. When I went back home and discussed with my sis, she said I was quite skewed in my thinking, and that after a while we stopped discussing cos it got uncomfortable. I really don't know why I have to go around explaining to ple my stand. And it is really tuff and painful to be different from the rest. I am really not very secure I guess. It gets lonely being different. :( And tiring.
Saturday, August 12, 2006
2 interesting posts
1. What Would Jesus Buy?
Hur hur....what would He buy?
Hmm..Prada? Armani?
2. Possessed or Obsessed?
Haven't really read this article, cos it is so long! But its quite interesting in providing the background and different views on deliverance. :)
Hur hur....what would He buy?
Hmm..Prada? Armani?
2. Possessed or Obsessed?
Haven't really read this article, cos it is so long! But its quite interesting in providing the background and different views on deliverance. :)
Monday, August 07, 2006
The Cross
Long time since I blogged here, but I was so touched and challenged by a sermon that I downloaded from Cornerstone, that after listening to it, I wept in conviction of my sin, and how I've misinterpreted what the cross means.
http://www.cscc.org.sg/cornerstone/spiritualfood/spiritualfood4.htm
The msg was by Pastor David Ravenhill, titled "The Cross". Do download it to listen if u have the time to. Its such a vastly different msg from those I've heard, I wish that I could type it out. But mainly, the gist of it, was that God sent Jesus so that He could bring us to Himself. It was not so that we could dump our sins with Him, and then have a tkt to heaven, and that was that. But now that we are saved, we become slaves/servants to God.
And he said..many of us christians, after we have been saved, we don't ask God what our purpose was. But instead, we continue on with the plans that we have. E.g. a person who aspired to be a lawyer, is converted some time when he is 16, and he just continues on to go to law school, cos thats what he always wanted to do. But how can it be after conversion, that this person's life remains the same? Planning and going about doing what he wanted to do all his life, even before he became a christian.
Ahh..u must listen to the sermon! I was so convicted that I cried, cos I told God, if He wanted to send me to somewhere in the world to preach, I would go. And then I thought of my parents angry with me. But I felt something broke tonight. And I surrendered control of my life to God.
http://www.cscc.org.sg/cornerstone/spiritualfood/spiritualfood4.htm
The msg was by Pastor David Ravenhill, titled "The Cross". Do download it to listen if u have the time to. Its such a vastly different msg from those I've heard, I wish that I could type it out. But mainly, the gist of it, was that God sent Jesus so that He could bring us to Himself. It was not so that we could dump our sins with Him, and then have a tkt to heaven, and that was that. But now that we are saved, we become slaves/servants to God.
And he said..many of us christians, after we have been saved, we don't ask God what our purpose was. But instead, we continue on with the plans that we have. E.g. a person who aspired to be a lawyer, is converted some time when he is 16, and he just continues on to go to law school, cos thats what he always wanted to do. But how can it be after conversion, that this person's life remains the same? Planning and going about doing what he wanted to do all his life, even before he became a christian.
Ahh..u must listen to the sermon! I was so convicted that I cried, cos I told God, if He wanted to send me to somewhere in the world to preach, I would go. And then I thought of my parents angry with me. But I felt something broke tonight. And I surrendered control of my life to God.
Thursday, July 13, 2006
Fellowship
I've been thinking about 2 things recently: Fellowship and Salvation
First of all, what does fellowship mean?
I like what Charles Colson & Ellen Vaughn write in Being the Body
As the book of Acts depicts so beautifully, the Christians of the first churches were of one heart, sharing their material possessions and caring for their brothers and sisters in need. Surrounded by a hostile culture and convinced that Christ was returning soon, they enjoyed the intimacy of shared lives, common cause, and deep friendships that crossed the social and economic barriers of their day. Ordinary believers whose lives had been transformed by the power of Jesus, they truly were what they called themselves; the communio sanctorum-the communion of saints....
Surveys show that the number-one thing people look for in a church today is fellowship. But what most modern Westerners seek is a far cry from that the Bible describes and what the early church practiced. No term in the Christian lexicon is more abused than fellowship...
But the word for "fellowship" in the New Testament Greek, koinonia, means neither punch and cookies nor cookie-cutter Christians. It conveys something richer. Literally it means "a communion", a participation of people together in God's grace. It describes a new community in which individuals willingly covenant to share in common, to be in submission to each other, to support one another and "bear one another's burdens,"as Paul wrote to the Galatians, and to build each other up in relationship with the Lord.
You see, what makes people see the difference in us? We as a group of people who live our lives differently and sacrifice for each other- that is love that God called us to have for each other, and how ple know that Christ is alive in us. A community...a new community of believers.
I've also been thinking about salvation and repentance. Out of curiosity that Jonathan Edwards was mentioned many times in the books that I was reading, I went to google for his sermons- and the most famous one being "Sinners in the Hands of an Angry God", preached at Enfield, which stirred the hearts of mean and women. People repented of their sins, came to God and revival broke thru the land. That was in 1739-1740, the start of the Great Awakening in America.
How does revival come about? I believe that revival comes when there is repentance. People come to God and say that they are sorry for their sins, and there is a contrite heart, and a fear of God because He is so Holy. I was scanning thru the sermon by Edwards, and the whole sermon was filled with hell fire & God's judgement on sinners, and yet how He is merciful to keep us alive. And I was pretty shocked. Esp when I compare it with today's evangelistic sermons that focus mostly on God's love, come to Him...He loves u, and if you are a sinner He will forgive u etc. Don't get me wrong, I am sure God is a loving God. Its just that sometimes the sermons can get so watered down that even if people respond, there may not be genuine repentance...a genuine contrite heart that recognises one has sinned. Because receiving Christ, is not just coming to blessings and God's love, but these come, as we repent of our past and sins, and acknowledge that we need God. So its not just about lovely musicals or sermons on the prodigal son. But impt-that ple realise that God is Holy and that we are so in need of Him.
And yes, when we talk abt evangelising to people, we mustn't be afraid to speak to them abt Christ. And sometimes we may even be offensive to them. I believe that whatever Peter and Paul said were offensive to the jews. Repent of yr sins!! Those that u worship are idols! They are lifeless! And they dared to share boldly of Christ. And then the Word cuts thru the hearts of the people, and we realise how wretched we are without God.
First of all, what does fellowship mean?
I like what Charles Colson & Ellen Vaughn write in Being the Body
As the book of Acts depicts so beautifully, the Christians of the first churches were of one heart, sharing their material possessions and caring for their brothers and sisters in need. Surrounded by a hostile culture and convinced that Christ was returning soon, they enjoyed the intimacy of shared lives, common cause, and deep friendships that crossed the social and economic barriers of their day. Ordinary believers whose lives had been transformed by the power of Jesus, they truly were what they called themselves; the communio sanctorum-the communion of saints....
Surveys show that the number-one thing people look for in a church today is fellowship. But what most modern Westerners seek is a far cry from that the Bible describes and what the early church practiced. No term in the Christian lexicon is more abused than fellowship...
But the word for "fellowship" in the New Testament Greek, koinonia, means neither punch and cookies nor cookie-cutter Christians. It conveys something richer. Literally it means "a communion", a participation of people together in God's grace. It describes a new community in which individuals willingly covenant to share in common, to be in submission to each other, to support one another and "bear one another's burdens,"as Paul wrote to the Galatians, and to build each other up in relationship with the Lord.
You see, what makes people see the difference in us? We as a group of people who live our lives differently and sacrifice for each other- that is love that God called us to have for each other, and how ple know that Christ is alive in us. A community...a new community of believers.
I've also been thinking about salvation and repentance. Out of curiosity that Jonathan Edwards was mentioned many times in the books that I was reading, I went to google for his sermons- and the most famous one being "Sinners in the Hands of an Angry God", preached at Enfield, which stirred the hearts of mean and women. People repented of their sins, came to God and revival broke thru the land. That was in 1739-1740, the start of the Great Awakening in America.
How does revival come about? I believe that revival comes when there is repentance. People come to God and say that they are sorry for their sins, and there is a contrite heart, and a fear of God because He is so Holy. I was scanning thru the sermon by Edwards, and the whole sermon was filled with hell fire & God's judgement on sinners, and yet how He is merciful to keep us alive. And I was pretty shocked. Esp when I compare it with today's evangelistic sermons that focus mostly on God's love, come to Him...He loves u, and if you are a sinner He will forgive u etc. Don't get me wrong, I am sure God is a loving God. Its just that sometimes the sermons can get so watered down that even if people respond, there may not be genuine repentance...a genuine contrite heart that recognises one has sinned. Because receiving Christ, is not just coming to blessings and God's love, but these come, as we repent of our past and sins, and acknowledge that we need God. So its not just about lovely musicals or sermons on the prodigal son. But impt-that ple realise that God is Holy and that we are so in need of Him.
And yes, when we talk abt evangelising to people, we mustn't be afraid to speak to them abt Christ. And sometimes we may even be offensive to them. I believe that whatever Peter and Paul said were offensive to the jews. Repent of yr sins!! Those that u worship are idols! They are lifeless! And they dared to share boldly of Christ. And then the Word cuts thru the hearts of the people, and we realise how wretched we are without God.
Friday, June 30, 2006
Being the (church) Body
Interesting Quote by C.S. Lewis:
" I didn't go to religion to make me happy.
I always knew a bottle of Port would do that.
If you want a religion to make you feel really comfortable,
I certainly don't recommend Christianity."
-----
The church is not a blding..but it is the gathering of a group of believers.
Charles Colson & Ellen Vaughn, Being the Body
"This is the great tension. On the one hand, there is the church God has created and intends for ultimate consummation as the bride of Christ. That church, said C.S. Lewis is a spectacle that makes the boldest demons uneasy, for 'she spread out through all time and space and rooted in eternity, terrible as an army with banners.'
But that ultimate vision is far more glorious than the present reality we see around us everyday in this fallen world: little congregations gathering in white wooden chapels and vast denomintaions meeting in grand cathedrals, street-corner preachers, megachurch pastors, Salvation Army bell ringers, television orators and traveling evangelists. Many of them spend much of the time either bickering with or ignoring each other. This church, the one the world sees, resembles nothing much as a gigantic flea market with the vendors competing against on another, hawking their wares in a huge discordant din.
Messy, ambiguous, imperfect? You bet. There is no perfect or model church. But we should not despair-for at least two reasons.
First, tensions allow for a variety of expressions which, often confounding human wisdom, reach people who might not otherwise be reached. There is richness in our diversity that strengthens the overall witness of the church. Different confessions, because of their own emphasis, make differing aspects of the spiritual reality visble...
Second...The institutional church, like all other institutions, comes under the influence of the Fall...this dynamic may well save us all from the one fate worse than chaos: triumphalism. That is, the very real temptation to believe that we have all of the truth, thus confusing ourselves with the kingdom of God. ..
But as imperfect as we are on this side of heaven, the miracle is that God in fact chooses to use His church-us-as His means of proclaiming love, truth, and hope.
Not always clearly; not always unequivocally. We all cringe when a church leader does some dreadful thing or when a layperson says some crazy thing into television camera. But somehow, through all the muddle, the gospel goes forth. People often come to church for all the wrong reasons, but God draws them to Himself. Churches can thunder down all the wrong tracks, and then repent and be renewed.
Admittedly, the pettiness and failures, the division and discord, can be disheartening at times. What a sorry mess we mortals often make of things in the name of the church! But our comfort comes from God's miraculous promise that He will build His church."
I hope the above comforts u.
I don't enjoy the feeling of church "shopping". I am not shopping. I'm not looking for the perfect, flawless church to belong to. I just want to belong to a church where I can be a part of the body of Christ. Where as a community, we can be a light that shines. Where I can follow the biblical commandment to not give up the meeting of together. In my heart is the ideal church. But the church, made up of individuals like u and me, is never in the ideal state. Yet I believe in God's heart for the church, for as a group of believers, how much more we can impact our society.
I feel such a deep sense of disillusionment within me. Disatisfied a lot of times...and smtimes even angry. Sigh. I don't know how to manage that.
This week when I visited Covenant's cg as I blogged in the other blog, I think many of the ple in the cg belong to rich families. And we have our cars, careers, and studies etc. All these are God's blessings. Then I think...can we live less rich lives and how much more we can give to others. Can we give up our careers and go to mission fields and totally live our lives for God. Can we give up our comfortable lifestyle? And what does it mean to follow God.
Then the next moment I get a lift right home cos my contacts was displaced, and I received smses of encouragement, and it made me feel really loved. And this body of God's believers, tho not perfect in the way we live...yet, being in the body, is God's plan for us, that we may encourage one another in various ways. I ask myself, instead of judging ple, can I judge my own life, am I loving enough, kind enough? Generous enough? And I fall short of everything. Don't mistake me...i'm not preaching about doing more works to please God.
Teach me God, to be more loving, generous and kind. And give me the grace..to live the kind of life u call me to live.
" I didn't go to religion to make me happy.
I always knew a bottle of Port would do that.
If you want a religion to make you feel really comfortable,
I certainly don't recommend Christianity."
-----
The church is not a blding..but it is the gathering of a group of believers.
Charles Colson & Ellen Vaughn, Being the Body
"This is the great tension. On the one hand, there is the church God has created and intends for ultimate consummation as the bride of Christ. That church, said C.S. Lewis is a spectacle that makes the boldest demons uneasy, for 'she spread out through all time and space and rooted in eternity, terrible as an army with banners.'
But that ultimate vision is far more glorious than the present reality we see around us everyday in this fallen world: little congregations gathering in white wooden chapels and vast denomintaions meeting in grand cathedrals, street-corner preachers, megachurch pastors, Salvation Army bell ringers, television orators and traveling evangelists. Many of them spend much of the time either bickering with or ignoring each other. This church, the one the world sees, resembles nothing much as a gigantic flea market with the vendors competing against on another, hawking their wares in a huge discordant din.
Messy, ambiguous, imperfect? You bet. There is no perfect or model church. But we should not despair-for at least two reasons.
First, tensions allow for a variety of expressions which, often confounding human wisdom, reach people who might not otherwise be reached. There is richness in our diversity that strengthens the overall witness of the church. Different confessions, because of their own emphasis, make differing aspects of the spiritual reality visble...
Second...The institutional church, like all other institutions, comes under the influence of the Fall...this dynamic may well save us all from the one fate worse than chaos: triumphalism. That is, the very real temptation to believe that we have all of the truth, thus confusing ourselves with the kingdom of God. ..
But as imperfect as we are on this side of heaven, the miracle is that God in fact chooses to use His church-us-as His means of proclaiming love, truth, and hope.
Not always clearly; not always unequivocally. We all cringe when a church leader does some dreadful thing or when a layperson says some crazy thing into television camera. But somehow, through all the muddle, the gospel goes forth. People often come to church for all the wrong reasons, but God draws them to Himself. Churches can thunder down all the wrong tracks, and then repent and be renewed.
Admittedly, the pettiness and failures, the division and discord, can be disheartening at times. What a sorry mess we mortals often make of things in the name of the church! But our comfort comes from God's miraculous promise that He will build His church."
I hope the above comforts u.
I don't enjoy the feeling of church "shopping". I am not shopping. I'm not looking for the perfect, flawless church to belong to. I just want to belong to a church where I can be a part of the body of Christ. Where as a community, we can be a light that shines. Where I can follow the biblical commandment to not give up the meeting of together. In my heart is the ideal church. But the church, made up of individuals like u and me, is never in the ideal state. Yet I believe in God's heart for the church, for as a group of believers, how much more we can impact our society.
I feel such a deep sense of disillusionment within me. Disatisfied a lot of times...and smtimes even angry. Sigh. I don't know how to manage that.
This week when I visited Covenant's cg as I blogged in the other blog, I think many of the ple in the cg belong to rich families. And we have our cars, careers, and studies etc. All these are God's blessings. Then I think...can we live less rich lives and how much more we can give to others. Can we give up our careers and go to mission fields and totally live our lives for God. Can we give up our comfortable lifestyle? And what does it mean to follow God.
Then the next moment I get a lift right home cos my contacts was displaced, and I received smses of encouragement, and it made me feel really loved. And this body of God's believers, tho not perfect in the way we live...yet, being in the body, is God's plan for us, that we may encourage one another in various ways. I ask myself, instead of judging ple, can I judge my own life, am I loving enough, kind enough? Generous enough? And I fall short of everything. Don't mistake me...i'm not preaching about doing more works to please God.
Teach me God, to be more loving, generous and kind. And give me the grace..to live the kind of life u call me to live.
Sunday, June 25, 2006
The Cross
The first time I listened to Smail's tape, I cried and wept. I felt the comforting presence of the Holy Spirit. U know at times when we don't understand why we suffer, or go thru trials, ple tell us we must have FAITH to pray for our breakthrus and to believe in God. And we are really discouraged when we don't get our breakthroughs. Is it cos we don't have enuff faith? But could it be that the world is simply not perfect, and that "God's purposes in such situations is not always to take us out of what is threatening to hurt or destroy us, but is sometimes rather to take us through it. Our ultimate victory comes not from escaping evil but from being given the ability to endure and bear it..."
Find some of the answers here as u struggle thru!
Abstract from Tom Smail- The Cross and the Spirit: Toward a Theology of Renewal
Toward a Theology of Suffering
There is, however, another whole area in which the Paschal model
has much to offer. As well as opening up, as we have just been seeing,
a fresh approach to renewal and healing in their relationship to Christ's
cross, it also makes possible a new understanding of unrelieved suffering
and failure to heal. These are always a great problem for the Pentecostal
model, which is exposed to constant temptation to a glib triumphalism
that arouses in people expectations which it is only sometimes able to
fulfill, with the sad result that many people are left in deep guilt because
they did not have enough faith to be healed, or else in disillusionment
because the promises so confidently made to them have not been kept.
When we expose this whole dark area to the light that comes from
the cross and resurrection of Jesus, we can begin to see that God's
purpose in such situations is not always to take us out of what is
threatening to hurt or destroy us, but is sometimes rather to take us
through it. Our ultimate victory comes not from escaping evil but from
being given the ability to endure and bear it, the way that Jesus bore it
on the cross, so that the death that was its ultimate destructive onslaught
upon Him became the way to His own Easter victory and to the world's
salvation.
When God's own self-giving love gets into the midst of a situation
dominated by sin, suffering, and death, the way it did with Jesus on the
cross, it acts creatively and transformingly on that situation. What is
in itself totally destructive can become, by Christ's presence in it, salvific
and redemptive. Christ does not rise on Easter day in spite of His
sufferings and death, but rather because of them. The risen Jesus is still
the wounded Jesus; in His resurrection He does not leave His passion
behind Him; He bears the marks of it still in His body and displays them
as the trophies of His triumph. His suffering is the very stuff out of
which He fashions His glory.
The New Testament makes it clear that the way of the Master is
the way of the disciple. He calls us to take up our cross and follow Him.
That means that we have no guarantee of immunity either from the
kind of suffering that is a direct consequence of our discipleship or from
the accidents, misfortunes, illnesses, and disabilities that afflict other
people and are as liable to afflict us as well. Paul was imprisoned in
Philippi as a direct result of his Christian witness there (Acts 16:23),
but equally the ship on which he sailed for Rome was not spared the
storm and the shipwreck that were the normal risk of all Mediterranean
seafarers at that time of year (Acts 27). He was rescued from neither a fresh approach to renewal and healing in their relationship to Christ's cross, it also makes possible a new understanding of unrelieved suffering and failure to heal. These are always a great problem for the Pentecostal model, which is exposed to constant temptation to a glib triumphalism that arouses in people expectations which it is only sometimes able to fulfill, with the sad result that many people are left in deep guilt because
they did not have enough faith to be healed, or else in disillusionment
because the promises so confidently made to them have not been kept.
When we expose this whole dark area to the light that comes from
the cross and resurrection of Jesus, we can begin to see that God's
purpose in such situations is not always to take us out of what is
threatening to hurt or destroy us, but is sometimes rather to take us
through it. Our ultimate victory comes not from escaping evil but from
being given the ability to endure and bear it, the way that Jesus bore it
on the cross, so that the death that was its ultimate destructive onslaught
upon Him became the way to His own Easter victory and to the world's
salvation.
When God's own self-giving love gets into the midst of a situation
dominated by sin, suffering, and death, the way it did with Jesus on the
cross, it acts creatively and transformingly on that situation. What is
in itself totally destructive can become, by Christ's presence in it, salvific
and redemptive. Christ does not rise on Easter day in spite of His
sufferings and death, but rather because of them. The risen Jesus is still
the wounded Jesus; in His resurrection He does not leave His passion
behind Him; He bears the marks of it still in His body and displays them
as the trophies of His triumph. His suffering is the very stuff out of
which He fashions His glory.
The New Testament makes it clear that the way of the Master is
the way of the disciple. He calls us to take up our cross and follow Him.
That means that we have no guarantee of immunity either from the
kind of suffering that is a direct consequence of our discipleship or from
the accidents, misfortunes, illnesses, and disabilities that afflict other
people and are as liable to afflict us as well. Paul was imprisoned in
Philippi as a direct result of his Christian witness there (Acts 16:23),
but equally the ship on which he sailed for Rome was not spared the
storm and the shipwreck that were the normal risk of all Mediterranean
seafarers at that time of year (Acts 27). He was rescued from neither
persecution nor misfortune, but was brought through both to fresh
opportunities for the gospel.
So for Christians today there come times when Jesus calls us to
follow Him in the way of the cross, where the delivering signs and
wonders do not happen, where the trouble from which we pray to be
freed is neither removed nor alleviated, but becomes the material out
of which God fashions us into richer and deeper realms of renewal,
which, looking back, we see could not have been reached in any other
way.
Very relevant to all this is the saying of C. S. Lewis, "Miracles are
for beginners." I take this to mean that, when we are in the early stages
of the Christian life, where faith most needs to be confirmed and built
up, God will often show himself to be the rescuer, who gets us out of
our trouble. When, however, we become stronger and more mature,
He will often honor us, not by giving us the deliverances we ask, but
by calling us to follow Jesus through the dark, even deadly places where
no relief comes, to the new life that lies on the other side of whatever
Jordan of suffering and affliction we have to cross. And, of course, none
of us will in the end escape the ultimate Jordan of death, which is the
only access to the final glory that awaits us.
We need not take too literally the time-scale implied by the Lewis
dictum. It is not only at the start of the Christian life that faith and
confidence need to be built up, and God's wonderful rescuing deliver-
ances can come at any time and in any situation, as in His wisdom and
freedom He may choose. Nevertheless, Christian growth toward ma-
turity comes less from seeing miracles than from being taken through
suffering and learning to trust God to work out His good purposes in
and through what we have to endure. If we can see Him at work only
when we are rescued from evil, and cannot trust Him when the signs
cease and the wonders do not happen we shall be in danger of remaining
permanently in the Christian nursery instead of learning, as Paul put it
to Timothy, "[to] endure hardship ... like a good soldier of Christ Jesus"
(2 Timothy 2:3).
The New Testament paradigm for all this is undoubtedly the way
Paul understands what he calls his thorn in the flesh in 2 Corinthians
12:7-9. Much ink has been spilled in trying to identify what exactly he
was talking about, and commentators have suggested everything from
epileptic fits and eye trouble to the harrying of persecuting Jews. That
debate is bound to be without conclusion since the relevant evidence
is almost entirely lacking.
Nevertheless, Paul does tell us quite clearly that, whatever the
precise nature of his trouble may have been, it was something that on
the face of it fulfilled no obvious useful purpose. It gave him continual
pain and played into the hands of Satan by at least partially disabling
him from doing what God had called him to do. That much can be
inferred from 12:7, "There was given me a thorn in the flesh, a messenger
of Satan to torment me."
Paul's response to this situation was to pray that he should be set
free from this disability, and to persist in this prayer when its request
was not immediately granted. "Three times I pleaded with the Lord to
take it away from me" (v. 8). The answer to that prayer, when at length
it came, was a very specific refusal of the deliverance he asked for. To
put it in current charismatic jargon, Paul was given a word of knowledge
to the effect that he was to live with his affliction and not expect to be
freed from it.
God was going to lead him by the way of the cross, by not rescuing
him from the trouble, but by using it to bring him into even closer
dependence upon himself. Paul had had sensational spiritual experi-
ences, which he hints at in the verses immediately before this passage,
and there was a danger that he might be carried away by them, so as to
depend on them rather than the God who gave them—always a temp-
tation for those who have had charismatic experiences, even of a much
lesser kind. In such circumstances he needed his affliction to drive him
back continually on his dependence on God. "But he said to me, 'My
grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness' "
(v. 9). A disabled apostle depending on God is far more usable than a
healthy apostle living out of his own spiritual capital.
It is as if God had said to him, "Your thorn in the flesh must remain,
for although Satan put it there, I can use it to make you keep relying on
me and so to outwit Satan. For when you rely on me in your wound-
edness, you are far more powerful in my service than if you were
brimming with physical health, psychological balance, and spiritual self-
sufficiency." The way that Paul goes on shows how well he has learned
that hard lesson: "Therefore 1 will boast all the more gladly about my
Weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me. That is why, for
Christ's sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in per-
secutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong" (vv. 9-10)
"My power is made perfect in weakness"; "When I am weak, then
I am strong." Those who understand what is happening to them in these
terms are those who have entered deeply into the mystery of the strange
power that God in Christ exercises from the apparent powerlessness
of^the cross. They know that when we assess these things in terms of
a theologia cmcis, weakness and power, suffering and triumph, defeat and
victory, rejection and acceptance, death and resurrection are not con'
ttadictory but complementary, impossible as that may seem from any
-other standpoint.
As the Church of England Doctrine Commission report We Believe
m the Holy Spirit puts it, "Jesus and his passion represent for us the
touchstone of the power of which we speak, its effects when poured
out, and its confrontation with other concepts of power abroad in the
world."3 In other words. God's power is understood in accordance with
what we have been calling the Paschal model, it is the power of the
cross, of the crucified and risen Lord.
That is why Paul can cope with God's refusal to remove his thorn
in the flesh. He has learned at the cross not just about a rescuing God
who takes people out of trouble but about a saving God who can use
their trouble for their remaking, just as He used the awful suffering of
Jesus for the remaking of the world. The Pentecostal model can offer
us a theology of healing and triumph, but it cannot provide the basis
for a theology of suffering and failure, which we need just as much. For
that we have to turn, with Paul in his own suffering, to the Paschal
model, with its center in the cross.
Renewal in the Spirit and Sharing the Cross
Far from advancing beyond the cross when we are renewed in the
Spirit, needing to return to it only when we sin and need pardon, the
Paschal model shows us that the more we are filled with the Spirit, the
more we shall share in both cross and resurrection, again and again.
The triumphalistic expectations of uninterrupted release and constant
victory which the more naive part of the charismatic constituency has
sometimes chenshed and even taught are contradicted by both Scripture
and experience alike.
For our New Testament example of this we need only remember
Stephen, who is introduced to us in Acts 6 as a man -full of faith and
of the Holy Spirit" (v. 5) and "full of God's grace and power (v. 8)-a
model charismatic indeed! Precisely because he was so full of the Spirit.
Stephen saw that the gospel of Christ could not be contained within
the bounds of Jewish exclusivism, but that through it God was moving
out in grace from Israel to the whole Gentile world. Such a message
roused against him a murderous Jewish opposition that contrived his
stoning. Just as it had contrived the crucifixion-But because
the Spirit who filled Stephen was the Spirit who had filled Jesus on the
cross he met his death in the same forgiving love to his enemies and
trust in God. so that the last words of the martyr echo Ac last words
of the master:-Lord. do not hold this sin against them (7:60); Lord
Tesus, receive my spirit" (7:59).
But as death and defeat were not the end of the story for Jesus,
neither were they for Stephen. Luke tells Stephen s story in a way that
brings out quite clearly how his tragedy was used to bnng about his
triumph both in heaven and on earth. We are told how in the midst of
his suffering he had a charismatic vision of the glory that awaited him
with God- "I see heaven open and the Son of Man standing at the right
hand of God" (Luke 7:56). Professor William Manson used to point
out to his Edinburgh students that this is the only place inthe New
Testament where the exalted Lord is said to stand at the Father s right
hand. In all other references he is said to szt, because sitting is the
attitude of regnant majesty. But when the martyr who has followed the
Lord all the way to the death comes, to receive him and to honor him
the Son of Man rises from His throne. Almost, "Stand up, stand up for
Stephen!" That is indeed triumph in heaven.
But there is tnumph for Stephen and all that he died for here on
earth as well. Luke tells us that -Meanwhile, the witnesses [to Stephen s
stoning] laid their clothes at the feet of a young man named Saul (7:58),
who was soon also due to meet the exalted Lord on the road to Damascas. There he would be asked why he was continuing to kick against
the pricks, why, in other words, he was resisting the growing conviction
that, in persecuting the Christians, he was persecuting their Lord. If we
ask what had begun to shake him in his old hostility and prepare him
for his coming conversion, the answer, at which Luke at least hints, is
that it was the way Stephen died.
Thus the death of Stephen was a powerful factor in initiating the
taking of the gospel to the Gentile world through Paul. The very thing
for which the martyr had died was beginning to happen in a way and
to an extent of which he could never have dared to dream. Stephen
moves from being filled with the Spirit to a sharing of the cross, and
through that sharing of the cross to triumph both with God in heaven
and with God's mission here on earth. That is the Paschal pattern of
Christian life in the Spirit.
That pattern prevails equally in the more restricted world of the
spiritual gifts in which modern charismatics are most interested. Mother
Basileia Schlink of the Evangelical Sisterhood of Mary used to say that
all the gifts of the Spirit are marked with the sign of the cross. To
exercise a ministry of healing involves suffering with those who suffer
and having to bear all the insoluble mysteries of why one is healed and
another is not. Furthermore, if we desire to prophesy, we had better
remember all the biblical evidence that the popularity rating and indeed
the life-expectancy of authentic prophets has never been high!
Conclusions
It is time to summarize our conclusions. The central thrust of the
argument has been that renewal in the Spirit urgently requires a theology
that will do justice to all that is involved in it—a map of the journey to
God's land of promise that has clearly marked on it both the power and
the love, the failure and the triumph, the weakness and the strength,
the suffering and the healing, the dying and the rising again. We have
tried to show that a theology that will more adequately fulfil all these
requirements will be one that has at its center not the experience of
Pentecost only, but the Paschal mystery of the death and resurrection
of Jesus, to which the Spirit who came to the Church at Pentecost bears
witness in all His works and ways.
Of course, no theology can ever be finally adequate to the uncon'
trollable Spirit, who, as John reminds us, blows, like the wind, wherever
He pleases (John 3:8); but in all His incalculable freedom He remains
the Spirit whom the Father gave to us through the Son who was to die
and rise again. That is why the Spirit can so often be seen to be working
within the rhythm of Christ's cross and resurrection.
Paul says all that I have been trying to say in Philippians 3:10, where
he delineates the shape of the only renewal in the Spirit that at the end
of the day matters: "I want to know Christ and the power of his
resurrection and the fellowship of sharing in his sufferings, becoming
like him in his death, and so, somehow, to attain to the resurrection
from the dead."
Find some of the answers here as u struggle thru!
Abstract from Tom Smail- The Cross and the Spirit: Toward a Theology of Renewal
Toward a Theology of Suffering
There is, however, another whole area in which the Paschal model
has much to offer. As well as opening up, as we have just been seeing,
a fresh approach to renewal and healing in their relationship to Christ's
cross, it also makes possible a new understanding of unrelieved suffering
and failure to heal. These are always a great problem for the Pentecostal
model, which is exposed to constant temptation to a glib triumphalism
that arouses in people expectations which it is only sometimes able to
fulfill, with the sad result that many people are left in deep guilt because
they did not have enough faith to be healed, or else in disillusionment
because the promises so confidently made to them have not been kept.
When we expose this whole dark area to the light that comes from
the cross and resurrection of Jesus, we can begin to see that God's
purpose in such situations is not always to take us out of what is
threatening to hurt or destroy us, but is sometimes rather to take us
through it. Our ultimate victory comes not from escaping evil but from
being given the ability to endure and bear it, the way that Jesus bore it
on the cross, so that the death that was its ultimate destructive onslaught
upon Him became the way to His own Easter victory and to the world's
salvation.
When God's own self-giving love gets into the midst of a situation
dominated by sin, suffering, and death, the way it did with Jesus on the
cross, it acts creatively and transformingly on that situation. What is
in itself totally destructive can become, by Christ's presence in it, salvific
and redemptive. Christ does not rise on Easter day in spite of His
sufferings and death, but rather because of them. The risen Jesus is still
the wounded Jesus; in His resurrection He does not leave His passion
behind Him; He bears the marks of it still in His body and displays them
as the trophies of His triumph. His suffering is the very stuff out of
which He fashions His glory.
The New Testament makes it clear that the way of the Master is
the way of the disciple. He calls us to take up our cross and follow Him.
That means that we have no guarantee of immunity either from the
kind of suffering that is a direct consequence of our discipleship or from
the accidents, misfortunes, illnesses, and disabilities that afflict other
people and are as liable to afflict us as well. Paul was imprisoned in
Philippi as a direct result of his Christian witness there (Acts 16:23),
but equally the ship on which he sailed for Rome was not spared the
storm and the shipwreck that were the normal risk of all Mediterranean
seafarers at that time of year (Acts 27). He was rescued from neither a fresh approach to renewal and healing in their relationship to Christ's cross, it also makes possible a new understanding of unrelieved suffering and failure to heal. These are always a great problem for the Pentecostal model, which is exposed to constant temptation to a glib triumphalism that arouses in people expectations which it is only sometimes able to fulfill, with the sad result that many people are left in deep guilt because
they did not have enough faith to be healed, or else in disillusionment
because the promises so confidently made to them have not been kept.
When we expose this whole dark area to the light that comes from
the cross and resurrection of Jesus, we can begin to see that God's
purpose in such situations is not always to take us out of what is
threatening to hurt or destroy us, but is sometimes rather to take us
through it. Our ultimate victory comes not from escaping evil but from
being given the ability to endure and bear it, the way that Jesus bore it
on the cross, so that the death that was its ultimate destructive onslaught
upon Him became the way to His own Easter victory and to the world's
salvation.
When God's own self-giving love gets into the midst of a situation
dominated by sin, suffering, and death, the way it did with Jesus on the
cross, it acts creatively and transformingly on that situation. What is
in itself totally destructive can become, by Christ's presence in it, salvific
and redemptive. Christ does not rise on Easter day in spite of His
sufferings and death, but rather because of them. The risen Jesus is still
the wounded Jesus; in His resurrection He does not leave His passion
behind Him; He bears the marks of it still in His body and displays them
as the trophies of His triumph. His suffering is the very stuff out of
which He fashions His glory.
The New Testament makes it clear that the way of the Master is
the way of the disciple. He calls us to take up our cross and follow Him.
That means that we have no guarantee of immunity either from the
kind of suffering that is a direct consequence of our discipleship or from
the accidents, misfortunes, illnesses, and disabilities that afflict other
people and are as liable to afflict us as well. Paul was imprisoned in
Philippi as a direct result of his Christian witness there (Acts 16:23),
but equally the ship on which he sailed for Rome was not spared the
storm and the shipwreck that were the normal risk of all Mediterranean
seafarers at that time of year (Acts 27). He was rescued from neither
persecution nor misfortune, but was brought through both to fresh
opportunities for the gospel.
So for Christians today there come times when Jesus calls us to
follow Him in the way of the cross, where the delivering signs and
wonders do not happen, where the trouble from which we pray to be
freed is neither removed nor alleviated, but becomes the material out
of which God fashions us into richer and deeper realms of renewal,
which, looking back, we see could not have been reached in any other
way.
Very relevant to all this is the saying of C. S. Lewis, "Miracles are
for beginners." I take this to mean that, when we are in the early stages
of the Christian life, where faith most needs to be confirmed and built
up, God will often show himself to be the rescuer, who gets us out of
our trouble. When, however, we become stronger and more mature,
He will often honor us, not by giving us the deliverances we ask, but
by calling us to follow Jesus through the dark, even deadly places where
no relief comes, to the new life that lies on the other side of whatever
Jordan of suffering and affliction we have to cross. And, of course, none
of us will in the end escape the ultimate Jordan of death, which is the
only access to the final glory that awaits us.
We need not take too literally the time-scale implied by the Lewis
dictum. It is not only at the start of the Christian life that faith and
confidence need to be built up, and God's wonderful rescuing deliver-
ances can come at any time and in any situation, as in His wisdom and
freedom He may choose. Nevertheless, Christian growth toward ma-
turity comes less from seeing miracles than from being taken through
suffering and learning to trust God to work out His good purposes in
and through what we have to endure. If we can see Him at work only
when we are rescued from evil, and cannot trust Him when the signs
cease and the wonders do not happen we shall be in danger of remaining
permanently in the Christian nursery instead of learning, as Paul put it
to Timothy, "[to] endure hardship ... like a good soldier of Christ Jesus"
(2 Timothy 2:3).
The New Testament paradigm for all this is undoubtedly the way
Paul understands what he calls his thorn in the flesh in 2 Corinthians
12:7-9. Much ink has been spilled in trying to identify what exactly he
was talking about, and commentators have suggested everything from
epileptic fits and eye trouble to the harrying of persecuting Jews. That
debate is bound to be without conclusion since the relevant evidence
is almost entirely lacking.
Nevertheless, Paul does tell us quite clearly that, whatever the
precise nature of his trouble may have been, it was something that on
the face of it fulfilled no obvious useful purpose. It gave him continual
pain and played into the hands of Satan by at least partially disabling
him from doing what God had called him to do. That much can be
inferred from 12:7, "There was given me a thorn in the flesh, a messenger
of Satan to torment me."
Paul's response to this situation was to pray that he should be set
free from this disability, and to persist in this prayer when its request
was not immediately granted. "Three times I pleaded with the Lord to
take it away from me" (v. 8). The answer to that prayer, when at length
it came, was a very specific refusal of the deliverance he asked for. To
put it in current charismatic jargon, Paul was given a word of knowledge
to the effect that he was to live with his affliction and not expect to be
freed from it.
God was going to lead him by the way of the cross, by not rescuing
him from the trouble, but by using it to bring him into even closer
dependence upon himself. Paul had had sensational spiritual experi-
ences, which he hints at in the verses immediately before this passage,
and there was a danger that he might be carried away by them, so as to
depend on them rather than the God who gave them—always a temp-
tation for those who have had charismatic experiences, even of a much
lesser kind. In such circumstances he needed his affliction to drive him
back continually on his dependence on God. "But he said to me, 'My
grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness' "
(v. 9). A disabled apostle depending on God is far more usable than a
healthy apostle living out of his own spiritual capital.
It is as if God had said to him, "Your thorn in the flesh must remain,
for although Satan put it there, I can use it to make you keep relying on
me and so to outwit Satan. For when you rely on me in your wound-
edness, you are far more powerful in my service than if you were
brimming with physical health, psychological balance, and spiritual self-
sufficiency." The way that Paul goes on shows how well he has learned
that hard lesson: "Therefore 1 will boast all the more gladly about my
Weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me. That is why, for
Christ's sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in per-
secutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong" (vv. 9-10)
"My power is made perfect in weakness"; "When I am weak, then
I am strong." Those who understand what is happening to them in these
terms are those who have entered deeply into the mystery of the strange
power that God in Christ exercises from the apparent powerlessness
of^the cross. They know that when we assess these things in terms of
a theologia cmcis, weakness and power, suffering and triumph, defeat and
victory, rejection and acceptance, death and resurrection are not con'
ttadictory but complementary, impossible as that may seem from any
-other standpoint.
As the Church of England Doctrine Commission report We Believe
m the Holy Spirit puts it, "Jesus and his passion represent for us the
touchstone of the power of which we speak, its effects when poured
out, and its confrontation with other concepts of power abroad in the
world."3 In other words. God's power is understood in accordance with
what we have been calling the Paschal model, it is the power of the
cross, of the crucified and risen Lord.
That is why Paul can cope with God's refusal to remove his thorn
in the flesh. He has learned at the cross not just about a rescuing God
who takes people out of trouble but about a saving God who can use
their trouble for their remaking, just as He used the awful suffering of
Jesus for the remaking of the world. The Pentecostal model can offer
us a theology of healing and triumph, but it cannot provide the basis
for a theology of suffering and failure, which we need just as much. For
that we have to turn, with Paul in his own suffering, to the Paschal
model, with its center in the cross.
Renewal in the Spirit and Sharing the Cross
Far from advancing beyond the cross when we are renewed in the
Spirit, needing to return to it only when we sin and need pardon, the
Paschal model shows us that the more we are filled with the Spirit, the
more we shall share in both cross and resurrection, again and again.
The triumphalistic expectations of uninterrupted release and constant
victory which the more naive part of the charismatic constituency has
sometimes chenshed and even taught are contradicted by both Scripture
and experience alike.
For our New Testament example of this we need only remember
Stephen, who is introduced to us in Acts 6 as a man -full of faith and
of the Holy Spirit" (v. 5) and "full of God's grace and power (v. 8)-a
model charismatic indeed! Precisely because he was so full of the Spirit.
Stephen saw that the gospel of Christ could not be contained within
the bounds of Jewish exclusivism, but that through it God was moving
out in grace from Israel to the whole Gentile world. Such a message
roused against him a murderous Jewish opposition that contrived his
stoning. Just as it had contrived the crucifixion-But because
the Spirit who filled Stephen was the Spirit who had filled Jesus on the
cross he met his death in the same forgiving love to his enemies and
trust in God. so that the last words of the martyr echo Ac last words
of the master:-Lord. do not hold this sin against them (7:60); Lord
Tesus, receive my spirit" (7:59).
But as death and defeat were not the end of the story for Jesus,
neither were they for Stephen. Luke tells Stephen s story in a way that
brings out quite clearly how his tragedy was used to bnng about his
triumph both in heaven and on earth. We are told how in the midst of
his suffering he had a charismatic vision of the glory that awaited him
with God- "I see heaven open and the Son of Man standing at the right
hand of God" (Luke 7:56). Professor William Manson used to point
out to his Edinburgh students that this is the only place inthe New
Testament where the exalted Lord is said to stand at the Father s right
hand. In all other references he is said to szt, because sitting is the
attitude of regnant majesty. But when the martyr who has followed the
Lord all the way to the death comes, to receive him and to honor him
the Son of Man rises from His throne. Almost, "Stand up, stand up for
Stephen!" That is indeed triumph in heaven.
But there is tnumph for Stephen and all that he died for here on
earth as well. Luke tells us that -Meanwhile, the witnesses [to Stephen s
stoning] laid their clothes at the feet of a young man named Saul (7:58),
who was soon also due to meet the exalted Lord on the road to Damascas. There he would be asked why he was continuing to kick against
the pricks, why, in other words, he was resisting the growing conviction
that, in persecuting the Christians, he was persecuting their Lord. If we
ask what had begun to shake him in his old hostility and prepare him
for his coming conversion, the answer, at which Luke at least hints, is
that it was the way Stephen died.
Thus the death of Stephen was a powerful factor in initiating the
taking of the gospel to the Gentile world through Paul. The very thing
for which the martyr had died was beginning to happen in a way and
to an extent of which he could never have dared to dream. Stephen
moves from being filled with the Spirit to a sharing of the cross, and
through that sharing of the cross to triumph both with God in heaven
and with God's mission here on earth. That is the Paschal pattern of
Christian life in the Spirit.
That pattern prevails equally in the more restricted world of the
spiritual gifts in which modern charismatics are most interested. Mother
Basileia Schlink of the Evangelical Sisterhood of Mary used to say that
all the gifts of the Spirit are marked with the sign of the cross. To
exercise a ministry of healing involves suffering with those who suffer
and having to bear all the insoluble mysteries of why one is healed and
another is not. Furthermore, if we desire to prophesy, we had better
remember all the biblical evidence that the popularity rating and indeed
the life-expectancy of authentic prophets has never been high!
Conclusions
It is time to summarize our conclusions. The central thrust of the
argument has been that renewal in the Spirit urgently requires a theology
that will do justice to all that is involved in it—a map of the journey to
God's land of promise that has clearly marked on it both the power and
the love, the failure and the triumph, the weakness and the strength,
the suffering and the healing, the dying and the rising again. We have
tried to show that a theology that will more adequately fulfil all these
requirements will be one that has at its center not the experience of
Pentecost only, but the Paschal mystery of the death and resurrection
of Jesus, to which the Spirit who came to the Church at Pentecost bears
witness in all His works and ways.
Of course, no theology can ever be finally adequate to the uncon'
trollable Spirit, who, as John reminds us, blows, like the wind, wherever
He pleases (John 3:8); but in all His incalculable freedom He remains
the Spirit whom the Father gave to us through the Son who was to die
and rise again. That is why the Spirit can so often be seen to be working
within the rhythm of Christ's cross and resurrection.
Paul says all that I have been trying to say in Philippians 3:10, where
he delineates the shape of the only renewal in the Spirit that at the end
of the day matters: "I want to know Christ and the power of his
resurrection and the fellowship of sharing in his sufferings, becoming
like him in his death, and so, somehow, to attain to the resurrection
from the dead."
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