Thanksgiving 2008

Thank God for (very summarised):

Family-
Miraculous change in my parents attitude towards me working in an NGO!
Parents getting more involved in church ministry
Mum starting a blog to tell others about God!

Spiritual Growth-
Fear of the Lord and not of men (still work in progress...)
I can't but God can. It is God who delivers and will deliver again
The Father heart of God, Jesus who understands my pain and sympathizes with my weaknesses
God is the healer of my broken heart- Jesus Himself came and heal up the wounds in my heart

Ministry-
Introduction to GBG ministry and radical community!
God in the dark alleys
God is the one who works in the lives of the people- when the mighty humble themselves! Saw how He moved and changed the hearts of my DG members

Work-
It was humbling. Through criticisms and different working styles, I was forced to find my identity- I needed to know who I am in Christ.
In the midst of uncertainty and seemingly impossible situations, I needed to know God's identity- who is God?
He is the God of justice. The God who will provide! And He is the intimate Father God.
And I am His child, secure in Him. Created in the way He made me to be.

What is faith all about?

My sis passed me a copy of Harvest Times to read, it happened to have a lot of features on missions and humanitarian work that CHC was doing. I was glad to read it, to hear the expanding ministries and I celebrate the wonderful things that God has been doing through the ministry. :) A teeny whiney part of me misses that kind of faith that I found in the church, to believe God for anything, to pray boldly in the Spirit, to worship God in tongues, to see visions and signs and wonders. Afterall, our God is still alive, and shdn't we be in expectancy of His great works?
The balance me now has learnt of "presumptuous faith" and suffering. With that in mind, I know that even in the most difficult seasons whereby there is seemingly little or no growth, God is still at work and He is sovereign. He has His reasons for not allowing certain things to happen, and He has His timings at work.

So how does the balance me operate with that FAITH bit, that believes and asks and receives? Sometimes I miss just that sense of being so presumptuous and bold.

Balance me has helped me a lot though, in terms of disappointments. That it is not altogether always celebratory.
I find myself asking though- Where is that joy? That sense of expectancy...that sense of faith in God?
Don't get me wrong balance is not faithlessness.
Yet there is a need for myself to reconcile all that is happening in my life & in the world.
To have that sense of faith and expectancy.